I had to re-train my roommate. nosleep

I had to re-train my roommate. She wouldn’t stop using my things.

Okay. In all fairness, the girl is only 18. I’m 24. This is probably what I get for moving in with a teenager, right?

I was didn’t have many options though. My boyfriend kicked me out of our old apartment. I wasn’t on the lease but I had established tenancy, so I told him he’d have to give me 30 days.

He was such a spiteful asshole about it. Took out a B.S. restraining order. I didn’t show up to court so he won by default. He changed the locks while I wasn’t home.

So, one desperate Craigslist ad later, and I’m stuck with Little Miss Clepto.

I tried to explain to this girl that I’m not stingy. If she wants anything from me, all she has to do is ask. But she doesn’t ask. She never asks.

I’ll give you some examples.

She uses my pots and pans and leaves dried crusted up eggs and cheese stuck to the bottom. Doesn’t even bother to soak them.

She’s never cleaned anything, come to think of it. Never emptied the trash. Never wiped down the counters. Never scrubbed out the shower or the toilet.

Also, she purchased all of ZERO appliances for the kitchen. Yet, that doesn’t stop her from trashing mine.

She broke my toaster the first week I bought it after she tried to toast bread with the butter and jam already on it. Freaking idiot almost electrocuted herself.

She’s left the refrigerator open twice within a month, forcing me to replace all the perishables we had in there. She didn’t even offer grocery money.

The other day she drank the rest of my almond milk and put the empty carton back in the fridge. Three days ago she “borrowed” my leather jacket without asking and ruined the material when she got so trashed she spilled vodka cranberry all over it.

I’ve tried talking. I’ve tried drafting a “roommate contract”. I’ve tried hiding my stuff in my room.

But it’s too much. I can’t live this way. And I can’t afford to move again.

Before you ask, yeah, I’ve talked to my landlord. He laughed it off. Said it seemed like I was “exaggerating” and lectured me about how cohabitation means compromise.

“It’s up to you to find a solution, honey.”

I thought it was a complete joke at first.

But after thinking about it, I realized he was right.

I had to find a solution.

I hear the shower running now.

She takes so long in the shower. I wouldn’t care much but she never cleans her hair out of the drain.

What’s worse is that this girl hasn’t bought her own shampoo since we moved in. I confronted her about always using mine weeks ago. She said she didn’t know what I was talking about. Played dumb.

Wait. I think I hear her.

Hmph. Figures.

Did you know sulfuric acid has no smell? It’s cheap too. You can buy a whole liter of it for less than a buck at most mechanic shops. They don’t even ID you. At least not where I live. I was kind of surprised. The stuff is potent. I’m not sure what happens when it’s mixed though. I barely passed my high school chem lab. All I really remember that our professor always stressed the importance of labels. You have to always double check to make sure you’re not using the wrong solution or whatever. Mix up a label and...well...

The best part of this is that she can’t rat on me because then she’ll have to admit she was using (aka stealing) my stuff all along. Genius, right?

Damn, she’s loud! She would have to scream her freaking lungs out while I’m trying to write.

Sorry, guys. I can’t concentrate with this noise. I have to cut this short.

I forget what my question was anyway.

I really wish this girl would hurry up and come out so we can talk.

I want to see her try to play dumb with me now.

Submitted November 30, 2017 at 02:35PM by AnonymouslyCreepy http://ift.tt/2zSA7gj nosleep