So Today I fucked up, while packing up to move back home after the school year ended, I put my trash in the trunk of my car (this included my test). Then I drove home and while unpacking I realized I forgot to throw it away in the dumpster at my apartment. So I took it across the street to the park from my house and threw it away in those trash cans.
The Next day I get an email from my professor saying I didn't put a code on my scantron and that I would get a zero if I didn't email it to him. So in a panic infused speed that put sonic the hedgehog to shame, I blast out the door, sprint across the yard like a hippy on a bad acid trip being chased by his refrigerator. I make it to the trashcan praying to god it wasn't picked up the night before, as my foot reaches the side of the trashcan it lands on the side of a rut that could only have been put there by satan himself. The odd, confusing, climatic joy of seeing a white trashbag in a trash can that not even oscar the grouch would call home, was broken by a sudden loud pop, and a feeling that can only be described as a space in my ankle join big enough for two fat lesbians to have a go at each other in, suddenly opened and then snapped shut like a vagina after hearing you have a moped. To onlookers it would appear as though I collapsed out of joy from seeing a dirty green trash can.
I then slowly get up next to my trash can, grab my slightly moist (with things I don't want to speculate about) white trashbag and limp back across the street and collapse in the yard. Then I as a homeless person begin to ruffle through the trash bag in my front yard for all to see. I find the test and thrust it above my head with the insane joy of a drug addict who finally caught the dragon.
TL;DR: Didn't put code on final exam, rushed out to get it, and now neighbors think I collapse out of joy from seeing green trash cans.
Submitted May 15, 2016 at 12:21AM by PanOfCakes http://ift.tt/23QF38R tifu
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