Three men stand at the Pearly Gates Jokes

God tells the three men that Heaven is near it's quota for the day and only one man will be allowed in.

All three men have lived good lives, so God decides he will choose who gets in to Heaven based on how they died. Whoever had the worst luck will get in to Heaven.

So the first man tells his story.

I married the love of my life. But she was too good looking for me. So I worked 60 hours a week to give her a good life. But because I worked so much, we barely got to be together and rarely had sex. After a while I had a hunch she was cheating on me. So I left work early one day and came home to our beautiful condo in our high rise building. When I entered, she was in the shower. So I snooped around thinking I'd find some evidence of a man being there. I looked everywhere but there was no evidence of another man in the condo. Distraught that I could think so low of the love of my life, I went out to our balcony to think everything over. But when I got out there, I saw a pair of hands hanging on to the ledge. I knew this must be the man my wife was cheating with. So I stomped his hands until he fell to the ground. But he wasn't dead. So I went inside and found the biggest thing I could throw off the ledge... The fridge. I threw it down and crushed him. Knowing the love of my life was unfaithful, I decided to take my own life. I shot myself, and next thing I know, I'm up here talking to you.

The second man immediately starts his story:

Well!... I was working out on my treadmill as I always do. But it was extremely hot in my condo, so I went to open the window and fell out. I thought I was going to die, but luckily I was able to grab the ledge of the balcony below mine. I was hanging there trying to pull myself up, when a crazy man started stomping my hands. I held on as hard as I could, but I fell to the ground. I thought I was dead. But I survived the fall. But just when I was thanking my lucky stars, I look up to see a fridge falling from the sky. Next thing I know, I'm up here talking to you.

The third man finally gets to tell his story:

Well, there I am, naked, sitting in some guys refrigerator...

Submitted August 05, 2015 at 08:18AM by isthishandletaken http://ift.tt/1T1NA3k Jokes