One day, Heaven is way too full and can’t accept the influx of people. So, while everyone inside works to find a solution, St. Peter is given explicit instructions: only let people in who have had a bad day on the day they died.
Late in the day, a middle-aged man walks up to the Pearly Gates and asks to be let into Heaven. St. Peter asks him how his day went.
“Oh, it was horrible,” the man replied. “I came home from work and walked up to my apartment on the 27th floor of my building. When I walked into my bedroom, my wife was laying there, no clothes on, and asked how work went. I knew there was something fishy going on , so I checked everywhere in my apartment to find the fucker who slept with my wife, but couldn’t find him.
“Finally, I stepped onto the balcony and saw the son of a bitch hanging from the railing. I grabbed him, threw him off, and watched him fall all the way down to the ground! But, miraculously, he survived the fall. So, I pick up my refrigerator and heave it over the balcony. It lands on him and, hopefully, kills him. The strain of picking up the fridge gave me a heart attack though, and I died on the way to the hospital.”
St. Peter is standing slack-jawed at the man in front of him and eventually says, “Head right on in sir, you deserve it!”
A little while later, a young man approaches the Pearly Gates and asks to be let in. St. Peter asks him how his day went.
“It was awful,” the young man says. “I was working out on the treadmill in my apartment. I keep it on my balcony so I can get fresh air when I work out, especially with it being on the 28th floor and all. Out of nowhere, the treadmill goes haywire and speeds up, throwing me off of my balcony. Luckily, I managed to grab the railing of the balcony below me and hung on for dear life!
“A few minutes later, this old guy comes onto the balcony and throws me off for no reason! I fall all the way down, but somehow I survive. But, as I’m trying to get up, the asshole throws a refrigerator off his balcony and it lands on me!”
St. Peter attempts to hide his chuckling as he lets the young man into Heaven.
A few minutes later, another middle-aged man approaches the Pearly Gates and asks for admittance. St. Peter asks him how his day went.
The man says, “Picture this: I’m naked, and in a refrigerator...”
Submitted December 30, 2017 at 09:11PM by zalexpop7 http://ift.tt/2BWBFTn Jokes
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