I'm trying not to rage too much about this and so far...Not doing so great at it. I don't know if anyone will care, and I know lots of other people in the world have bigger problems.
That being said, I haven't had an easy life. I've been poor for a long time now, I've worked in mostly warehouse jobs for more than a decade, thankfully I'm a big dude so people have no problem saying "Hey pick things up and put them down, you're hired!". I've lived in crappy houses and tiny, shitty apartments, just getting by in life. The first car I ever bought was $300, and it was 2 years younger than me at the time, it was a huge piece of shit, next car after that was $900, it was a great one even if a little older and...Well, purple Geo Metro lol. Next one was, again, a piece of shit 80s truck for under a grand. And finally, a 13-year-old Camry that was completely fine and a good car.
Then a few years ago, I finally got a break, someone interviewed me and gave me a shot at doing what I'm good at. They were floored, asked me "Why in the world are you working in a warehouse? You're great at this!", and since then I've been steadily making better money, doing a job I love, and I'm happy. Been slowly working my way out of debts incurred from being dirt poor for over a decade.
But I've still been real worried about losing my job in some way or another, I'm afraid of it honestly. I don't make big purchases, I don't go beyond my means at all, in fact the only TV in my house is one that I got for Christmas (with a credit card -_-) in 2006 or 2007. I have a spartan amount of furniture, and for a while I was staying with the OMG BARE ESSENTIALS pantry & refrigerator stock. Just because I've been worried to death that something's going to happen in two weeks and I'll have to subsist on what I've got in the bank right now.
I mention all that because I finally made a turning point in that midway through 2015. A milestone birthday was coming up, and I had to replace a few things on my car that year. So I thought you know what? I'm gonna get a new car! I deserve it, and it's a big step forward. After about 3-4 months of research, I picked out the exact model and make I wanted, voila found one in the colors I wanted in town, even a manual transmission like I love! Bumpy road to buying it, but I got it at a decent price, and was happy!
I finally had something to show for my work, something for myself that said "This is the turning point, this is where you branch off and climb out of the muck, and do good by yourself!". Maybe it's stupid to attach something like that just to a car, but it meant something, stood for something. I sent my father pictures of it and he was like, "Damn! Look at my son, making it as a businessman!", that's how it felt. I still smile at my car when I see it sitting all pretty in my garage or in a parking lot, it's a nice looking car, it's not too flashy, but it's fun and it fits me (both literally and figuratively).
Today I was driving home. Sitting at a red light, behind 3 other cars. SUV full of ghetto-trash comes bombing up, right into me at about 40 MPH. The section of road before the light I was stopped at is literally a mile and a half of straight, no hills. Their initial reaction was to yell at me. Then they started to pull into the turning lane to take off, when someone else thankfully pulled up and asked me if I wanted them to pull over to act as a witness. So the SUV yells more about NAH DON'T PULL OVER HERE. Then they pull off into a nearby gas station, then circle around...And suddenly there's only 2 people in the car instead of 5, the previous driver not being one of them present anymore.
I'm really grateful for the guy that pulled over to help me out because the trash in the SUV was all insistent; No need for the cops to get involved! It's fine, we'll just exchange insurance, I got you covered! We'll get you some new rims, you want some weed? (seriously I'm not making this shit up -_-) Witness immediately called the cops, the other female riding in the car yelled at him until the weed-offering one yelled at her to go away. When the cops arrived, there was some difficulty in locating the original driver, and the name the woman had written down on her insurance wasn't her own (surprise).
Anyway, sorry for dragging this on. My point is; An SUV full of human garbage fucked up the one thing I proudly own in my life. I don't have a super-nice-ritzy house (rent anyway), don't have fancy appliances or suave furniture. My car was the one fucking thing I had that I could proudly say, this is mine. I earned this, I worked out huge issues in my life, climbed over a mountain of depression to get this. And now it's all fucked up. Hopefully it's mostly cosmetic, but even still I don't know if that'll be repairable or if it is, how much I'll have to pay; I do have full-coverage insurance but you know how sketchy insurance companies like to be on forking out money, especially over "minor issues" like cosmetic damage.
I'm pissed off and saddened by that alone. But their shitbag attitude about the whole thing, the criminals running off, trying to lie on insurance, that one of them fucking put on more lipstick when the cops were pulling up. It's absolutely damaged my faith in humanity. The fact that if there was a solitary brain cell in that entire SUV, my car would be still a pristine mark of achievement for myself. Now that's marred for me.
I know people get into accidents all the time, of course. I'm not the only victim of dumbasses who don't deserve the right to drive. But I'm just so goddamned eaten up inside, because it meant so very, very much to me. I try to calm down, but then I get so mad I can't even see straight, and it's been about 9 hours now. And then I get even madder at myself; I didn't need to go into town, hell I didn't even buy anything I was shopping for. Christ almighty why didn't I just stay home?! Now I'm feeling that old fury picking at my mind that I haven't felt in years, that old terrible depression is weighing down on me.
Submitted May 01, 2016 at 11:38AM by bigblackcouch http://ift.tt/26GiRCy offmychest
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