Hear me out.
The other day I was at a bookstore and they were selling fidget spinners at the till, along with the other impulse-buy items like chocolate bars and city maps and refrigerator magnets. The queue was long and so I picked up a sample spinner and started playing with it. It was oddly satisfying. It had a nice heft to it, with a substantial metal disc in each lobe whirling around the bearings in the center. The movement was smooth and it made a soothing whirring sound. I set it down when the queue got to me and made my purchase and left. I felt a little self-conscious to have been so captivated by it.
Later that evening I met up with a couple of friends for happy hour, and I mentioned in passing that I played with one of those spinny things that all the kids these days have and that everyone over a certain age hates. One friend admitted to having nearly bought one earlier that same day, because he'd played with one at a grocery store and enjoyed it. He refused to buy it even though it was on 50% discount, because he was embarrassed to be seen buying a fidget spinner; like me, he too is a grown-ass 30-something man.
I was relieved that I wasn't alone in 1) the satisfaction of playing with a fidget spinner, and 2) the admittedly unwarranted feeling of awkwardness about it. So yesterday afternoon I was going over to this same friend's house to work on a project. I stopped at the grocery store along the way, and decided to man up and buy two discount fidget spinners. One for me and one for my friend. I got a receipt with it so that it looked like I was buying them for kids. I wasn't. But my friend and I got too caught up in our work, and I forgot to give him his fidget spinner.
I came home, took them out of their packaging, and fidget-spun with both hands all night while streaming old episodes of "Seinfeld". My hands are cramped and sore today. I feel like I did when I was a pre-teen and learned how to masturbate. I guess in a way this isn't a whole lot different.
Submitted July 31, 2017 at 10:48PM by ormr_inn_langi http://ift.tt/2uOpR4D PointlessStories
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