BumHam’s Mom’s rules are as follows; she’ll have a place setting for him at her dinner table every night. It is his responsibility to get to her home and on time. If he’s late his food will be wrapped and he can take it back to wherever he came from. If he fails to pick up his food it goes to the dogs. If he shows up at unreasonable hours expecting to be fed he goes to the dogs.
The arrangement is a godsend since BumHam’s Mom lives across town and, in the event he can’t hitch a ride and has to waddle over, it takes him most of the evening.
I cannot imagine losing a sibling, let alone your best friend for over 65 years, understandably Gram takes it pretty hard. Her Niece and I take shifts seeing that she sits up for a while and gets some nourishment. It is a lot of responsibility for a 14 year old but this is a great kid raised by two wonderful people.
It is during one of my shifts that I’m sitting with Gram in the living room. She naps often and cries just as much, it’s a good moment for her as she’s doing neither when BumHam walks in.
“My Mom isn’t home today, can I get something to eat?” he says into a room full of blank stares.
Without any opposition he enters the kitchen while nervously chattering, “You didn’t cook?”
“Who do you think is going to cook, BumHam?” Gram finally responds.
“I don’t know, nobody brought nothin’?” he says referring to the sympathy platters he’s been living off.
“Go away, BumHam” Gram says quietly
BH can’t hear so he steps back into the room, “Huh?”
“Just.get.out.” she hisses through her teeth.
“Are you okay, Auntie?” He asks stalling, he can’t quite wrap his head around this new development.
“I’m tired. Damn tired and I’ll not be putting up for you anymore.”
“You’re gonna’ put me out?” he says laying on the guilt
“17 years is long enough, you’re on your own. Your Father is gone, I got a young woman (BumHam’s Daughter) to worry about now. Last thing I need is some Bum eating us out of house and home. Did you even think about that?” she doesn’t give him a chance to respond, “No, you just think about yourself and whatever you’re going to eat next. I’m done” and she was.
BumHam left without incident but he became increasingly agitated when he kept being rebuffed at the door and ignored at every interaction around town by his Aunt and Daughter. After a few months Gram resumed working and starting picking up the pieces.
Meanwhile BH plotted an alcohol fueled crusade to become Father of the Year. He’s not invited in to eat? Then everyone can eat spoiled food. His favorite game was to flip Gram’s breakers while she was out and let the refrigerator sit.
Any and every chance he got he was attempting to ask the two for “a couple bucks” as an excuse to talk. Neither took the bait and before long he’d just run up, pull faces, and make noise then run away again like a gorilla behind a glass. Gram stuck to her guns though, she wasn’t about to let him run her life.
Until one day, he approaches them in the driveway as they’re about to start the morning.
“What do you want?” Gram asks sharply without rolling the window down
BumHam puts a smile on his face and says “Can I get a few dollars for some snacks?”
“No” she says “You could lose a few pounds” and with that she begins to back up in the car.
BH throws himself on the hood, but instead of stomping around like he intended he is too fat and uncoordinated to get upright while the car sways under his weight. He settles on lying on his back like a turtle and stomping one foot in place hoping to cause some damage.
Gram tells him, “You get off or I’m going to drive you off and run you over after!”
BumHam attempts to comply but Gram speeds backwards anyway dropping him into a pathetic pile on the gravel. She sees her Niece off at school and goes straight to the Court House to file a restraining order and ask that he be put in jail to sober up. He’s arrested within minutes, still wandering around Gram’s yard.
While he’s incarcerated BumHam’s Mom and Brothers take the opportunity to have a formal meeting with Gram about BumHam’s future. They understand her frustration, they’re all still grieving, and Bummy’s shenanigans are the last thing anyone needs.
His Daughter is shook, she feels unsafe being in the home and worries about her Aunt’s safety as well. After a consult with the local Judge he suggest they place him back in rehab and when he’s “dried up” the Judge will issue a mandated psychiatric evaluation to get to the bottom of his erratic behavior.
BumHam is in rehab for six months, no visits, no calls and no letters as the behavioral health unit he’s in care of is stricter than his own Mother. Due to the circumstances of his being there the Family is notified when he’s nearing release. While not confirmed, it is believed he suffers from schizoaffective disorder, and with medication and weekly therapy he seems to be better.
Better meaning he’s an eerily quiet lethargic lump at no risk to anything but the bed legs that have to support him sleeping all day.
The Family meets again and does a quick shuffle. BumHam’s Daughter will now live with her Grandmother next door to MiddleBro. BabyBro, in the middle of a divorce, will move in with Gram to give his Wife some space and everyone else peace of mind when BH returns.
We brace ourselves for the worst, but it is actually the best. BumHam only leaves his room to eat, meet his court appointed Therapist, and submit weekly urine samples. On occasion he’ll do odd jobs as asked and Gram will get him snacks and take him to sporting events in town to get him out of the house into some fresh air.
Things are quiet enough that everyone has a chance to grieve and actually laugh again.
Submitted February 23, 2016 at 05:24AM by dumgril http://ift.tt/1KFpnC4 fatpeoplestories
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