"We were both young when I first saw you," sang the bearded loon. "Tay-tay, what'd'ya say, just you and I run off, and ditch this whole thing?" inquired the buffoon.
"By golly, you sure are as dim-witted as you appear," Taylor Swift had just about had enough of Duck Dynasty guy's risky contemplation. "Don't you know that we signed our lives away? These Arabs may look physically monkey-ish, but they have the wits to know that we Americans are so quick to betray, therefore I ask of you to swap the beard for a brain, and ask yourself whether they're keeping an especially close eye on us." The new Al Qaeda recruit made her point clear. Duck Dynasty guy stood biting his lip.
"Y'know, Tay-tay, you've got a really nice frame of mind about this whole thing. What'd'ya say we go round the back, and you blow me?"
Taylor Swift had no objection, and proceeded to perform fellatio on the bearded man forty years her senior.
Taylor: "Alright, now, we've got an appointment to keep. Remember, mission briefing, we are to maintain that we have come to this land to broaden children's horizons, and provide anecdotal evidence in how American customs can sweep their nation for the better."
Duck Dynasty guy: "Yeah, yeah. I remember rolling my eyes at the whole thing. I thought we'd be shootin' shit. How are we expected to convert these sand people to the ways of a them good ol' folks back home. It ain't right if ya ask me. Sure as shit, a turtle would adapt to lava quicker than persuading these people to wear jeans!"
Taylor: "I see what you're saying, but don't worry yourself with the stupidity of that concept, for it's merely a front. The principal of the school we are arranged to give our lecture is Gaddafi Al Bana.
Duck Dynasty guy: "Oh, yeah. The banana guy. The mastermind behind the Romanian refrigerator incident. I'll admit, I couldn't understand a word of the briefing. They gotta learn to talk real slow if you wanna get through to me. Hey, Tay-tay, how bout another go round the back, eh?
The two went to the school right on schedule. There they'd play it cool, and go through with their hidden agenda, under the guise of merely giving a lecture. As Duck Dynasty guy slipped away to the men's room, he passed through the cafeteria, and dropped a toxic capsule into a teapot prescribed for the principal. It was only a matter of time before they could leave the school successful of their first mission. One thing stood in their way, however, a boy named Greg Gorbos.
The Duck Dynasty guy returned to the class distraught over the confounded look on Taylor Swift's mug.
"The hell's the matter?" He blurted.
Taylor Swift handed him a hand-drawn picture of them having brutal sex, him bum fucking her. He furrowed his brow, and demanded to meet its creator. Then, amidst a crowd of brown faces, rose a pale one, like a looming sun over a sandy horizon.
Greg Gorbos: "It... It was me sir. I drew you fucking Taylor Swift in the bum. It's... It's a real shame you don't like it, sir. I... I worked really hard on it. You could see outstretched strands of semen and everything, sir."
His mouth agape, the Duck Dynasty guy stood speechless. Taylor Swift shared his level of disgust, and a feeling of paranoia struck the both of them, as if this child had been the witness to them fooling around. Although, just a delusion, had that boy seen them fool around, there was no telling what else he'd witnessed. A thousand possibilities sprang, could he'd seen the undercover operatives briefing the mission at hand? They looked at each other nervously, having not the slightest idea what this child knew. Suddenly, the class teacher intervened.
Teacher: "Greg Gorbos... See me after class."
The End
(The ending of this story marks the beginning of part one, this story was a prequel.)
Submitted May 06, 2016 at 11:23PM by IIBustyCrustaceanII http://ift.tt/1UFgEm1 creepypasta
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