I'm in my 20s and live with my mother currently (PA, US). She is on SSI for health reasons.
I have little job experience (outside of my field of interest and nothing really provable either considering the companies are out of business), but believe I have the right knowledge for basic IT work. The town I'm in however doesn't really have any openings for IT-related positions as I understand (this town nor surroundings doesn't have any notable IT employers afaik), and the only means of transportation I have is a taxi and bus (me nor my mom have a vehicle).
I myself have never applied for a credit card or any loans, but I know my mother has used my name (and siblings; they're younger than 18 and not living with us currently) for various credit cards and loans. She claims she can balance transfer and etc. to pay them off, but as for how this is working out currently or will work out in the future is beyond me. On a slightly related note, companies that send random credit card offers and loans through the mail must love her...
As for our financial situation, it's livable, but certainly not due to her actions. She has no problem with running electrical appliances when they aren't needed (she would rather run multiple window air conditioners and keep a CRT TV on 24/7 instead of using central air and simply turning the TV on when-needed), and has no problem paying what I find to be a pretty significant cable bill (about $150/month for 3 TV boxes and a high channel package when she's the only one who watches the TV). I've tried offering alternate solutions to no avail (mainly internet streaming and a OTA antenna) due to her not wanting to break "tradition". She also wants to care for 5 cats (and counting), and that alone also eats into the budget for cat liter and food.
As for other means of aid, we go to multiple food banks (she demanded I create fake IDs in my name for this), and currently, in order for me to keep my welfare health insurance, she heavily insisted on me trying to "fake" mental illness and apply for SSI (I believe the welfare requirement to stay on is to just apply and to not actually get on). I'm against doing such things mainly because I believe we're not in any condition to be needing them (we have more food than we can even store in two refrigerators and all the cabinets... not to mention the other stuff she could cut down on above), and also it is pretty low-down in my opinion. But I don't believe I'm in any real position to just say no...
My mom is also on housing assistance. It's no problem for me to live with her, but I have to sign a paper annually stating I've earned no income. If I were to start working, the foodstamps my mom gets currently would be cut to virtually nothing, and I would also have to pay a large chunk of rent, which would mean very little money in my own pocket. I've been using my time unemployed to further my knowledge through self-learning, building a portfolio, and to try to learn a second language.
A large concern of mine is about the various credit cards and loans in my name. I've never signed anything for a credit card nor loan, but I can't imagine this being easy to prove (credit cards only require a SSN and don't even validate DOB nowadays it seems). I would prefer not to pay-off the cards myself, but even if I did, my mom would for sure continue to use my name with or without my explicit permission. Is there a process for just getting a new SSN in the US? Could I just leave the country and renounce citizenship? (pretty sure that's a long-shot and nowhere near as-easy as I would think to do)
I'm pretty frustrated with the entire situation. I have dreams of just running away to a new country (or at the very least, somewhere away from here in the US) and starting anew, but the difficulty of doing this scares me. I live a pretty "cozy" life currently, but I'm certain this won't last forever nor do I prefer the unethical hoops I have to jump through to maintain it. Part of me just wants to sell everything that I own (probably wouldn't net anything above $2000 assuming anyone near me would even want to pay my ideal prices), and just "go" somewhere without any real plans. I have no idea what I would do for shelter or food long-term if I did just decide to go somewhere, but I could live somewhat minimalistic (I can sleep on floors with a blanket, have no issue with taking quick showers with cold water, and would love to deal with an affordable diet consisting only of a powdered food like Soylent and water). But perhaps just running away and starting new is too drastic?
What should I do?
Submitted May 08, 2016 at 04:50AM by throwawaythe10203 http://ift.tt/1s3OgPI Assistance
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