Thursday, December 31, 2015

[For Sale]Antique Lucas / Luxor / Solar Carbide Bicycle Lamps - $250 LAlist

For sale are 3 calcium carbide bicycle lamps. These are approximately 100 years old, maybe more.

If you're not familiar with calcium carbide lamps, these have a reservoir at the bottom that you fill with calcium carbide pellets, and a reservoir at the top that you fill with water. Then you turn the flow screw, and water drips onto the calcium carbide, releasing acetylene gas, which you ignite, and you get a bright flame. Carbide lamps are still used on some miners/cavers helmets, but these, designed for bicycles, have a lens in front to protect the flame from the wind.

They may work with a little time and patience, but I am not selling them as working devices. I will provide some calcium carbide at no extra cost if you'd like to experiment at home to try to get them working. (Please experiment outside, on a non-flammable surface, wearing gloves and safety glasses and a fire extinguisher nearby, as 100 year old gear and acetylene gas can make for some excitement otherwise.)

It is very rare to see these in the states, especially on the West Coast, so these would make a great conversation piece, especially if you're a fan of steampunk. (I was going to use them on a steampunk bicycle project, but since other interests are taking precedence, I'd like to see them go to someone who'd enjoy them.)

  1. Acetyphote No. 517 from Jos. A. Lucas LTD. (If you're a British car buff, this is the company that would later prove the stuff of nightmares for MG, Austin, Triumph owners. (Hence the joke, "Why do the British drink warm beer?" "Because Lucas made refrigerators too.")) Slight crack in the front lens, but the red and green side lenses are in place. $120 if you'd like to buy it individually.

  2. Luxor Carbide Lamp - All lenses intact, appears to be missing a cork or a stopper from the water reservoir. $85 if you'd like to buy it individually.

  3. Solar Carbide Lamp - No visible brand name, but the nice carbide lamp dealer (such folks exist) who sold me this one sold it as a Solar Carbide Lamp. All lenses intact. May also need a cork for the water reservoir. $75 if you'd like to buy it individually.

$250 OBO for all 3.

PM me if you're interested. See pics at the craigslist ad - http://ift.tt/1IHBjlR



Submitted January 01, 2016 at 10:05AM by jbisinla http://ift.tt/1ZE0Ss0 LAlist

Any suggestions for new kitchen appliances?? Appliances

Any suggestions for new kitchen appliances?? In process of replacing appliances. refrigerator, gas range, dishwasher, & microwave. Don't mind mixing&matching brands. I'm told certain brands are better for certain appliances.Want to be economical. My thoughts were whirlpool, frigidaire &the like. Any suggestions for me here? Any deals you've seen with HomeDepot/Lowes/Sears/etc?



Submitted January 01, 2016 at 03:36AM by mitpreddit http://ift.tt/22B9JwR Appliances

So much yelling and barely any listening breakingmom

My twins are four. Typical two minute period:

I go to the kitchen to fix Twin A a snack. The other twin follows and says he wants a different snack. I say,cool, what would you like? My back is turned and instead of telling me, he opens the refrigerator to step inside and muck around with the light switch. I am asking him to get his dirty feet out of my fridge when Twin A comes in to laugh at his brother. Twin b gets out of the refrigerator while doing a high, fast whine about what he wants. I ask him to ask in a nice voice. Twin A turns on the dishwasher (he is not supposed to. He knows this). I ask him to stop pressing buttons and please leave the kitchen,which he ignores. Twin B then opens the craft drawer to pull out some felt, and ask what it is as he throws it all over the room. I lose it and bellow at everyone to PICK THAT UP, GET OUT OF MY KITCHEN and SIT DOWN AT THE TABLE. That's the only thing that makes them move anymore, and I hate it. I am constantly barking orders.

It's like an infuriating treadmill. We do timeouts, which works about half the time and I try to stay on top of their hungry/sleepy moods and cut a little slack if they're stressed, but it's like I'm talking to a wall. They're FOUR. What is it going to be like when they're teenagers? I am seriously going to end up committed. They are currently screaming their heads off in the living room and I just don't fucking care.

I have a book called How to Talk so Kids Will Listen but by the time I've got a minute to read I am so fucking over everything that I want to collapse. I wish I could turn them out into a yard but we live in a small apartment.

How do I keep them from egging each other on? How many times do I have to tell them not to play with the doors, or destroy everything they see? How can I get them to MODULATE THE VOLUME OF THEIR VOICES?! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD HELP ME



Submitted January 01, 2016 at 03:18AM by ChannelingPeg http://ift.tt/1JMtS7R breakingmom

Any suggestions for new kitchen appliances?? Appliances

Any suggestions for new kitchen appliances?? In process of replacing appliances. refrigerator, gas range, dishwasher, & microwave. Don't mind mixing&matching brands. I'm told certain brands are better for certain appliances.Want to be economical. My thoughts were whirlpool, frigidaire &the like. Any suggestions for me here? Any deals you've seen with HomeDepot/Lowes/Sears/etc?



Submitted January 01, 2016 at 03:36AM by mitpreddit http://ift.tt/22B9JwR Appliances

Free refigerator for scrap metal (Bensonhurst) FreeStuffNYC

Free non-working refrigerator for scrap metal.

from Craigslist http://ift.tt/1UixV15

via IFTTT



Submitted January 01, 2016 at 01:57AM by fiplefip http://ift.tt/1RTo30b FreeStuffNYC

I believe someone is stealing my electricity, am I doing everything right? personalfinance

Hi PF so here's the skinny:

I live in a complex with about 30 other tenants or so; I got my electricity bill yesterday and it was ~3.5X higher than usual. My energy usage over the last 4 prior months was hovering close to 150kWh; I'm billed bimonthly so my total usage per cycle is 300kWh.

I just got my bill and my usage showed 1077kWh (538 kWh/month). At first I thought this was a bad read by LADWP, so I went out and looked at my meter, nope. It's good. In fact, since they took their last read (December 17) It's increased by another 300kWh. Now here's the rub:

I've been gone since the 23rd and have left everything powered down, save my refrigerator.

So over the course of about 5-6 days of me living in my apartment since the last read there's been close to two months worth of energy usage. Here's what I've done so far.

  • Contacted LADWP (they said it looks like it's being stolen but I'm liable for charges)

Here is my current plan:

  • Contact apartment manager and look at my meter again, this time with my circuit breakers off to see if it's still turning

  • (assuming it's still drawing power) Contact local police, and have my landlord bring out an electrician to see where the power draw is coming from

  • pursue small claims court to see about getting my money back

For some background: my apartment has 5 lights (60-120W) a gaming PC (700W power supply unit) a refrigerator, and AC unit that I haven't run in 7 weeks. I am pretty frugal with energy usage and leave lights off when not in use and only have my PC on when in use. Assuming everything is in working order I don't see how these things, even if left on 24/7 could be using anywhere near this much power.

I'm not asking for legal advice, but if anyone has dealt with this situation or similar before, are there any other avenues I should be following to make sure my bases are covered and I have adequate proof?

*formatting



Submitted January 01, 2016 at 12:52AM by freeflyrooster http://ift.tt/1Ov7DEh personalfinance

My cat just jumped into the refrigerator. cats

http://ift.tt/1NXCrOU

Submitted January 01, 2016 at 01:23AM by CrimsonCub2013 http://ift.tt/1NXCrOW cats

My cat just jumped into the refrigerator. aww

http://ift.tt/22AZo4h

Submitted January 01, 2016 at 01:24AM by CrimsonCub2013 http://ift.tt/22AZo4j aww

LPT: If you're ordering something online and you're wary of having it left outside your house while you're away, have it shipped to your office. LifeProTips

Obviously keep it within a reasonable size (i.e. don't ship a refrigerator to your place of employment).

Most businesses still have mail rooms or shipping/receiving offices that receive items throughout the day and into the evenings. Your item(s) will be secure and, in many cases, delivered directly to your desk at some point in the day. Also, the mail room staff has no idea whether it's a personal item or business related, so that won't be an issue either.

I've done this numerous times throughout the years, at various employers, and it's worked flawlessly. This way I don't have to worry about my package sitting at my door in the open or having to take a day off to wait for a package.



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 10:03PM by Left-handed http://ift.tt/1YRwu0n LifeProTips

Free kitchen (Bayside ny) FreeStuffNYC

Need to get rid of my kitchen cabinets and refrigerator and gas stove.. They are in working condition. It is in coop building so you need hand truck and tools and two people prefered

from Craigslist http://ift.tt/1kwlTVz

via IFTTT



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 10:11PM by fiplefip http://ift.tt/1On1PkG FreeStuffNYC

ELI5: how did my water pitcher freeze in the refrigerator? explainlikeimfive



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 10:24PM by jhorn1 http://ift.tt/1YRww8z explainlikeimfive

Day 4 behind on sleep stopdrinking

I have all this extra energy at night. Last night I was up until almost 2:30 I think. I wake up pretty dam tired every day. I am going to have to try to catch up on my sleep somehow, maybe this weekend.

Last night was fine until about 12:00 when my wife went to bed and the thought hit me that I could just get up and have a drink. I stopped myself but had a pretty strong craving.

Sometimes I catch myself forgetting for a moment or two. Like when I first walked in the door yesterday I almost instinctively went right to the refrigerator to grab a beer. Realizing what I was doing before I opened the door. There wasn't any beer in there anyway but just an old habit.



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 09:13PM by Bletchlypark http://ift.tt/1Ts6Oke stopdrinking

[Pics] Not a New Year's resolution. Return to keto after pregnancy. keto

Hi all,

First post--want to get my current status/mental state/goals out there. I love when posters have a series of progress posts to go along with their progress pics. That will be me in 3/6/9 months!

I've been an on again off again low carb-er for a long time. Atkins style eating was always my go-to when I needed to lose those extra 10-15 pounds.

I was always in pretty good shape but thought of myself as fat since I wasn't small or lean. I played D1 sports at a little over 200lbs...so no, I wasn't ever the cute little girl. My weight went down to about 165 slowly as I left my sport behind but I was losing muscle, not fat. Grad school and several boyfriends who ate like crap caused me to put most of that weight back on--and not as muscle this time.

After my first child (2013) I recommitted to low carb and found this reddit. Y'all are great! And I love being able to think about the science behind how my body is using food.

However, my husband wasn't comfortable with me restricting carbs while pregnant/trying to get pregnant so I went off for our second child (I tried to go to something like Paleo, but pregnancy cravings were too good of an excuse to eat all the carbs). I packed on 10 pounds while trying to conceive and another 45 during pregnancy. I've lost 28 of that just from normal post-birth weight loss.

Now I have a happy little two month old. We have a great nursing relationship and my husband is on board with me returning to this lifestyle!

I'll be easing in so as not to tank my milk supply. I started this week just removing all the extra carbs (Juice, cereal, chips, chocolate, etc.) and making a few keto meals to start the refrigerator shift. Just this change liberated ~3lbs of water weight! I plan to be back to full keto in 2 to 3 weeks.

No extra exercise right now. It's all I can handle to parent my two children, nurse, work full time, and (when I get a moment to myself) shower... Although nursing means I'm burning an extra 300-500 calories a day!

My biggest motivation is to be a mom that my girls can look up to. My oldest definitely got my body type (as opposed to my husband's <10% BF with no effort--jerk) and I need to model healthy eating habits and a healthy attitude toward my own body. I don't want either of them to ever feel concern about their own bodies because they see mommy too embarrassed to wear a swimsuit on the boat or too tired to play.

For those who stayed with this...thanks! I look forward to being able to share progress pics but, for now, here is my starting pic.

http://ift.tt/1IGf27R



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 09:00PM by happymommytotwo http://ift.tt/1Ui5xfE keto

Question on Emergency Rations preppers

Hello, I recently purchased a new refrigerator and put my old fridge in the basement. I don't really have much to put in the old fridge except beer. My question to the community is, what kind of rations can I stick in that fridge (that don't need refrigerated if the power goes out), that I can use in an emergency power outage situation as rations for a couple days? Any help would be appreciated.



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 06:30PM by cheetahlip http://ift.tt/1kvS47H preppers

Traveling cheaply and feeling like I'm not eating what my body needs. Help please? vegan

I never really learned much about nutrition. At home this is fine... most vegan food is healthy, and I eat tons of greens, nuts, beans, tofu etc

Now I'm traveling and feeling very unhealthy. I can't afford to eat in restaurants, and don't have access to a refrigerator or kitchen (though I do have a microwave). I'm eating supermarket ready meals like pasta and sandwiches, plus fruit. I know I'm eating wrong, but don't know what I should be buying.

What should I be buying to make sure I stay healthy?



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 02:28PM by flossd http://ift.tt/1YQyGoE vegan

/r/askscience report: Thursday, January 01, 2015 - Wednesday, December 30, 2015 subredditreports

Totals: lotsa days, 26,167 posts, 465,745 comments.
Included in this report: The top 3,000 posts, and 212,363 of the top comments, by 79,760 distinct authors.
There were 14 gilded posts, and 209 comments were gilded.


See the comments for detailed reports and charts.


Most Popular Posts


Score Author Post Title
6415 /u/pensivebadger This coconut oil melted during a heat wave and later re-solidified. Why did it form this honeycomb structure?
6208 /u/Chlorophilia Why is it normal for children in practically all cultures to call parents "Mother" or "Father" rather than their real names?
5657 /u/MockDeath A message to our users
5575 /u/VeryLittle This is not a 'cicada year,' but I hear one buzzing outside right now. Is there a small set of cicadas out of sync with the main population, or do a few mistakenly mature early every year? Or is this a different species entirely?
5525 /u/powerpuff_threesome I've heard that one of the purposes of the "fresh cut grass" smell is a type of distress signal that warns nearby plants to start moving nutrients to the roots before they get cut down. Is there any truth to this?
5476 /u/thelonelyward3 Windows 10 says pins are safer than passwords how can this be when passwords have more combinations?
5460 /u/AskScienceModerator New Horizons flies by Pluto in 33 Minutes! - NASA Live Stream
5408 /u/HalJohnsonandJoanneM My textbook says electricity is faster than light?
5398 /u/ontheverge73 What would happen to me, and everything around me, if a black hole the size of a coin instantly appeared?
5252 /u/ttothesecond If I wanted to randomly find someone in an amusement park, would my odds of finding them be greater if I stood still or roamed around?
5158 /u/phrresehelp Could a modern day human survive and thrive in Earth 65 million years ago?
5071 /u/AMA_or_GTFO My girlfriend insists on letting her restaurant leftovers cool to room temperature before she puts them in the refrigerator. She claims it preserves the flavor better and combats food born bacteria. Is there any truth to this?
4744 /u/Moore1994 If I flip a coin 1,000,000 times, what are the odds of it beings heads AND tails 500,000 times?
4681 /u/_brokecollegestudent How long would it take a modern computer with code breaking softwear to crack the German enigma code from WW2?
4644 /u/Actionmaths Why do wind turbines only have 3 blades?
4643 /u/GATOR7862 Do sound canceling headphones function as hearing protection in extremely loud environments, such as near jet engines? If not, does the ambient noise 'stack' with the sound cancellation wave and cause more ear damage?
4599 /u/jk_here4all Does sexual preference (Straight/LGBT) change on memory loss ?
4558 /u/ImTheConan IF sound could travel through space, how loud would The Sun be?
4548 /u/naegermeister How the heck do jellyfish work if they have no brain or no blood?
4532 /u/JoeFalchetto Why don't we take blood from dead people?
4487 /u/jackwreid Given time to decompress slowly, could a human survive in a Martian summer with just a oxygen mask?
4431 /u/p0yo77 If we were far enough from earth, could we see the dinosaurs alive?
4336 /u/Hoggzeh How much shallower would the Oceans be if they were all devoid of life?
4288 /u/SayNoToFatChicks How do we know that there is a "Pluto-size ball of solid iron that makes up Earth's inner core"?
4198 /u/Nogamename11 Can dopamine be artificially entered into someones brain to make them feel rewarded for something they dont like?
4184 /u/babuguuscooties We know we'll see a supernova in 2016 because we've already seen it happen due to gravitational lensing. How is this possible?
4177 /u/AskScienceModerator Kepler 452b: Earth's Bigger, Older Cousin Megathread—Ask your questions here!
4159 /u/diminutive_sebastian Why is it that, if you add any sequence of numbers like this (1 + 2 + 3 + 4 + 5 + 6 + 7 + 8 + 7 + 6 + 5 + 4 + 3 + 2 + 1), the sum is always the square of the largest number?
4151 /u/A_Monsanto How common is it for animals to die during hibernation?
4147 /u/mayorofboxtown How can I explain to my boss that we did in fact have sufficient computing power in 1969 to perform the complicated maneuvers required to land on the moon?
4109 /u/johnm4jc Why is glass so loud?
4100 /u/crasyeyez Do creatures such as cuttlefish and octopuses get "tired" from using their camouflage?
4092 /u/7418520963 Light bends around massive objects. Could there be something so massive that light orbited around it?
4078 /u/sleepwalken If you farted hard enough in space, could you move yourself around?
4066 /u/nomad1c If you have an organ transplant, will your body gradually replace the DNA in it with your own, or will the cells continue to regenerate with the same external DNA?
4063 /u/rossatron688 Do human beings make noises/sounds that are either too low/high frequency for humans to hear?
4045 /u/InVultusSolis So far SETI has not discovered any radio signals from alien civilizations. However, is there a "maximum range" for radio signals before they become indistinguishable from background noise?
4041 /u/moistpandas I know of absolute zero at -273.15°C, but is there an absolute hot?
4033 /u/ToucanbT Could you stand on a gas planet or would you "fall" to the center?
4022 /u/malaria_protein AskScience AMA: We are scientists from the team that recently discovered a malaria protein with the ability to target many different types of cancer. Ask us anything!
3995 /u/squizzlestix How does the cell on the tip of my nose know to perform all the functions of a cell on the tip of my nose? How does it know that it isn't a cell on the side of my nose (or my liver, brain, etc.)
3955 /u/ArjaaAine Why hasn't evolution caused mammals to have many more females than males?
3933 /u/lysergic_25 Is it possible to have a planet at just the right size to have a solid surface, with a molten core which keeps the temperature at the surface suitable for life with no sun?
3917 /u/jdlc700 Would a person submerged in a tub of water, unable to drink, survive longer than a person out of water, also unable to drink?
3903 /u/graaahh If we viewed a star "going supernova" in real time, would it look like a violent explosion, or does it take a long time?
3892 /u/theresheblowshard Is there a bulge in earth's atmosphere constantly facing the moon?
3888 /u/Punishtube Why are Nuclear reactors never built in Water or below water?
3885 /u/RangeRedneck Why does putting salt water (saline) into our blood stream rehydrate us, but drinking salt water can harm us?
3879 /u/CyberPlatypus How does a computer know to turn itself back on when you tell it to restart?
3874 /u/wtricht If you drop your a phone or something else with a glass screen and the screen doesn't crack, does it have a higher chance of shattering the next time you drop it?
3866 /u/xxshteviexx When I'm on an airplane and I look straight ahead during takeoff or landing, I feel like I can see that the plane is pointed up or down. Can I really, or does my brain just extrapolate based on other information to create this illusion?
3862 /u/dongerduck If there was a body of water that was as deep as the Marianas Trench but perfectly clear and straight down, would you be able to see all the way to the bottom?
3859 /u/Ray_Nay If the sun disappeared from one moment to another, would Earth orbit the point where the sun used to be for another ~8 minutes?
3805 /u/KiwiMack How can I smell a piece of metal if it doesn't expulse any matter?
3785 /u/Slender_Spelunkers AskScience AMA Series: We’re Hannah Morris and Becca Peixotto, two of six “slender spelunkers” who excavated 1,500 individual hominin bone fragments deep in a South African cave over the course of 21 days, Ask Us Anything!
3784 /u/theskadudeguy Why isn't there an animal that could live for 1,000's of years?
3760 /u/Acode90 How far underwater could you breath using a hose or pipe (at 1 atmosphere) before the pressure becomes too much for your lungs to handle?
3741 /u/erroct If I had a 1 dollar coin, could I theoretically flatten it to the point where the coin would cover the entire Earth?
3741 /u/CreativeArbok Since DNA is an acid, is there such thing as DNA salts?
3738 /u/Snowodin Would drinking "heavy water" (Deuterium oxide) be harmful to humans? What would happen different compared to H20?
3697 /u/annonomouse2 If someone with schizophrenia was hallucinating that someone was sat on a chair in front of them, and then looked at the chair through a video camera, would the person still appear to be there?
3671 /u/quizzical The EU has banned many chemicals that are suspected of causing harm which are allowed in North America. Are there epidemiological studies finding differences in rates of disease related to this?
3669 /u/NeokratosRed Why is it that many cultures use the decimal system but a pattern in the names starts emerging from the number 20 instead of 10? (E.g. Twenty-one, Twenty-two, but Eleven, Twelve instead of Ten-one, Ten-two)?
3663 /u/Jakent10 Why does the Human body reject transplanted organs /tissue and proceed to destroy them but it doesn't kill parasites like worms ?
3640 /u/iamannagram Apparently bedwetting (past age 12) is one of the most common traits shared by serial killers. Is there is a psychological reason behind this?
3636 /u/pm-me-weird-stuff What would a cup full of viruses or bacteria look like?
3619 /u/coppersocks What will it mean for science if NASA announces it has found running water on Mars?
3615 /u/Schmitty422 I keep hearing about outbreaks of measles and whatnot due to people not vaccinating their children. Aren't the only ones at danger of catching a disease like measles the ones who do not get vaccinated?
3611 /u/ClassySirMike If everyone was required to stay at home for 2 months with zero contact with other people could we wipe out the cold/flu forever?
3597 /u/Dinomial Can you get hearing loss from exposure to loud noises outside our hearing range?
3592 /u/Pupikal If I were traveling at near the speed of light (enough to significantly slow time), would I be able to "think" normally? Would I be able to tell that time is slowing down?
3590 /u/Phaillip Do multiple wounds heal slower than just a single one?
3550 /u/--Danger-- What does an IQ of 70 entail, cognitively, emotionally, etc.?
3540 /u/Nowhere_Man_Forever Could life actually be supported by a constant thick mist and no rain?
3540 /u/howaboutwetryagain The pupils in our eyes shrink when faced with bright light to protect our vision. Why can't our ears do something similar when faced with loud sounds?
3539 /u/Saklor Why does Uranus look so smooth compared to other gas giants in our solar system?
3535 /u/MrDowntempo Would it be possible with modern technology to produce a sword that would handily deal with medieval swords and armor?
3525 /u/darthvalium At what rate, if any, does the earth produce fossil fuels?
3518 /u/_MostlyHarmless Do astronauts on extended missions ever develop illnesses/head colds while on the job?
3502 /u/koleslaw If a solid sheet of a metal were only an atom thick, would we be able to see through it?
3500 /u/meanwhile_in_SC If the Universe were shrunk to something akin to the size of Earth, what would the scale for stars, planets, etc. be?
3490 /u/anonradditor If we can't hear transmissions from somewhere like Kepler 452b, then what is the point of SETI?
3490 /u/Vinny_Lynch AskScience AMA: I'm Vinny Lynch, assistant prof. of human genetics at UChicago. I led one of two research groups that independently found why elephants don’t get cancer as frequently as we thought they should (Spoiler: 20 copies of the p53 tumor suppressor gene). AMA!
3489 /u/zaphod15 Are farts stored as compressed gas? What's the range of internal pressure?
3486 /u/purplepricklypear I work with identical 4 year old twins - one has severe autism, the other is normally developing. How does this fit into the whole nature/ nurture debate?
3485 /u/SlurpsMcgee If we could theoretically break the speed of light, would we create a 'light boom' just as we have sonic booms with sound?
3480 /u/AskScienceModerator Happy Pi Day! Come celebrate with us
3467 /u/janez_blond Is it theoretically possible for a nuclear reaction to happen randomly on earth (i.e. in nature)?
3461 /u/thesocialist1 Has there been a disease that was beneficial to humans?
3456 /u/MediocrePlayer Why is it that the moons gravity is able to direct masses of water in different directions but yet we, ourselves cannot physically feel the affect of the moon's gravity?
3455 /u/Chris_Wells_95 Does a rainbow extend into the invisible part of the spectrum?
3449 /u/EquationTAKEN How does exposure to radioactivity affect the human body? In biological terms, what's the deadly process?
3446 /u/Sheamau5 When we have to fight ourselves awake, what are we fighting exactly?
3440 /u/a_great_thinker Why can't I weigh the earth by putting a scale upside-down?
3427 /u/TheBananaKing Iron smelting requires extremely high temperatures for an extended period before you get any results; how was it discovered?
3426 /u/solarish Nuclear fusion reactors use supermagnets to suspend plasma and prevent it from damaging the containment structure. However, fusion also produces neutrons as part of the reaction, which have a net charge of 0. What steps have scientists taken to mitigate the damage from these high-energy neutrons?
3422 /u/GiftsAwait How do services like Google Now, Siri and Cortana, recognize the words a Person is saying?
3416 /u/Alphaetus_Prime If I pick up my coffee right after I stir it, so that it's still swirling around, will there be a gyroscopic effect making me less likely to spill it?
3414 /u/AlphaTyrant Does lightning strike the ocean? If so, does it electrocute nearby fish?
3409 /u/LostInTheAtlantic If you fingerprint a person as an infant, and again as an adult, will their fingerprints be the same?
3402 /u/Prufrock451 Is there any evidence that cetacean species communicate to each other (like grey whales calling and blue whales avoiding an area, etc)? Or are all of these species shouting past each other on different wavelengths?
3394 /u/redrainyskies Is the strength of muscles proportional to their diameter, cross-sectional area, or volume? Or is it not linear?
3373 /u/PrettyUnoriginal Why is the year 2100 not a leap year?
3371 /u/mcherm XKCD's "Fundamental Forces" isn't funny, it's sad. Can you do better?
3370 /u/FalconAF If photons have no mass, how can a laser beam bore a hole through something? Wouldn't the equation E=MC2 resolve to 0=0?
3366 /u/kevin4789 If you had a million mirrors placed in such a way that each would reflect off the next one, and you stand in front of one and move, would there be any lag between your movement and what appears on the final mirror?
3360 /u/romantep Came across this "fact" while browsing the net. I call bullshit. Can science confirm?
3356 /u/Schmackelnuts What is the air inside a bell pepper composed of?
3352 /u/sideplank If we can produce zero-calorie drinks easily, why don't we have zero-calorie food?
3344 /u/paul092834 Why does this ping-pong pong ball get sucked in, when I blow out through this toy tube?
3342 /u/epanchin Given their long lifespans, do turtles or bowhead whales get dementia?
3341 /u/leeboof The fastest spinning neutron star spins at 716 times a second. How much of the immense gravity would be counteracted by the centrifugal force? How many times earths gravity would an object on the surface experience?
3330 /u/mattyc1163 What causes this ring of fire from a Desert Eagle? Link in description (x-post r/woahdude)
3324 /u/heartk When an adult learns a new language, does their brain store the words in the same way as when they learn new words in their native language (i.e. expanding their vocabulary)?
3323 /u/epicluca If Voyager had a camera that could zoom right into Earth, what year would it be?
3306 /u/kevin4789 Why do dogs smell bad when wet?
3304 /u/ichegoya Do black holes ever die?
3297 /u/pudding_world It's my understanding that when we try to touch something, say a table, electrostatic repulsion keeps our hand-atoms from ever actually touching the table-atoms. What, if anything, would happen if the nuclei in our hand-atoms actually touched the nuclei in the table-atoms?
3281 /u/Dr_Prof_Doom As photosynthesis requires light, why aren't plants black to absorb the full spectrum of light, instead of green which doesn't?
3275 /u/Foofymonster Is there a way to harness gravity for energy? If so, why do we not discuss it when talking about green energy?
3272 /u/Gasdark So human beings have tested 2,153 nuclear bombs in the last 75 years - but I was under the impression that that many bombs set off at once would basically end the species - what has been the long term effects of all that testing on the world at large?
3266 /u/pm-me-with-your-tits The temperature in space is about 3K, however there are almost no atoms in space. My understanding is that heat is essentially atomic vibrations. If there are almost no atoms, how can there be residual heat?
3254 /u/DatDane Would it be possible for two people to grow together if they both were to cut off a hand/finger and then hold the wounds together?
3253 /u/EntropismAtWork What is the lowest temperature flame can be?
3251 /u/Grill_dont_fry Are all languages equally as 'effective'?
3248 /u/Veshter Is it possible to feel "high" without using drugs?
3245 /u/FerralWombat When my earphones are plugged into my laptop (and nothing is playing) I hear a hum. If I touch any metal surface on the laptop, the hum stops. What is causing both effects?
3230 /u/Mage98 How deep into the Earth could humans drill with modern technology?
3222 /u/rondeline If modern man came into existence 200k years ago, but modern day societies began about 10k years ago with the discoveries of agriculture and livestock, what the hell where they doing the other 190k years??
3222 /u/luckyhenry Does any animal have a life span so short that it never sleeps?
3218 /u/manbiteswolf Does the human eye have a quantifiable image resolution?
3217 /u/greatsawyer Why are deep sea fishs "uglier" and less symmetrical then their higher sea counterparts?
3217 /u/jpvl1 If I wrap a cold object in several blankets, will the object stay cold longer?
3210 /u/SailingB0aty Why is the speed of light, the speed it is?
3181 /u/Pinkie056 Does Adrenaline really reduce reaction time?
3165 /u/Dame_Juden_Dench Can depression and other mood disorders decrease mental ability? Can it make you dumber?
3162 /u/eplusl With advances in many fields of Medicine including the transplant of synthetic hearts and 3d printing of various body parts making cheap prosthetics possible, why haven't we seen significant advances in prosthetic cartilage for damaged joints and herniated disks?
3142 /u/EyeofEnder Are rings exclusive to gas planets? If yes, why?
3132 /u/jakdax99rb If light emits a significantly minute force, how much light would it take to crush a human?
3123 /u/roborovsky If I ate 10,000 calories in one go, would my body be able to digest it all? Or would some of those calories 'pass through' due to my digestive system being overwhelmed?
3093 /u/SpacetimeOdyssey When dinosaur bones were initially discovered how did they put together what is now the shape of different dinosaur species?
3090 /u/LoLlYdE Why do physics break down above the Planck Temperature?
3085 /u/Genchybaby How fast would you have to travel around the world to be constantly at the same time?
3085 /u/dantheman757 Why was Plutonium used instead of Uranium in the "Fat Man" atomic bomb?
3074 /u/moderately_extreme If a feather was in a decaying orbit around the Earth, would it burn up during re-entry?
3072 /u/Buttmolested If the gravity of the moon is strong enough to create tidal waves, why doesn't it lift up things like tree leaves or small animals?
3071 /u/Nachington Do chickens have a limited supply of eggs throughout their life, or can they produce eggs as long as they have a functioning reproductive systema?
3057 /u/idontcareforkarma What would happen if the moon was covered with a highly reflective material (such as tin foil)?
3042 /u/tika_b If a space ship were to have a cloth banner, a flag, on the outside, while in motion, would it "flap in the wind" or remain perfectly straight?
3034 /u/th4t5f1n3 If you roll a die twice under the exact same circumstances, and I mean every possible thing is the same, would it produce the same result?
3023 /u/Samppis Would people with dyslexia have problems reading Braille?
3019 /u/thefourthchipmunk In light of the new high-res photo of Andromeda, is there any chance that we will be revising our estimate of the total number of stars in the galaxy? (currently 1 trillion)
3015 /u/rickatnight11 Why is forest height on mountain ranges so uniform?
3009 /u/karch10k When a part of your body "falls asleep", can it cause any lasting damage?
3002 /u/imanatheistsowhat Would it be any dangerous at all to split even one atom?
2804 /u/Six_of_Diamonds Could we split a photon?


Submitted December 31, 2015 at 01:39PM by subredditreports http://ift.tt/1TrgGuk subredditreports

Wednesday, December 30, 2015

I'm hungry and my refrigerator is full, but... AdviceAnimals

http://ift.tt/1mr8orx

Submitted December 31, 2015 at 01:05PM by VeronicaRFlores http://ift.tt/1YTOJwJ AdviceAnimals

The Refrigerator of a Soylent 2.0 Bachelor soylent

http://ift.tt/1JgWhb0

Submitted December 30, 2015 at 04:50AM by fdefunct http://ift.tt/1PyFxve soylent

Reusing Tea tea

For those of you who reuse loose leaf tea many times, are you ever storing it overnight?

Is it ever ok to store it in a plastic bag over night in the refrigerator?

I can't drink more than 2 cups of tea at once and I'd like to get full use out of some of the good quality black and pu-erh tea that I have.



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 10:09AM by Tenaciousgreen http://ift.tt/1JgWevM tea

FREE. BEDROOM FUNITURE. TABLES AND CHAIRS DRESSERS. READ READ HURRY FreeStuffNYC

92 Amsterdam ave. Staten Island. We are putting a entire house contents to the curb. Beds bedroom sets Tables Chairs Dressers Refrigerators Microwaves Vacuum cleaners Plastic storage bins China Bowls antiques All at curb we don't want any [...]

from Craigslist http://ift.tt/1ZCHkEn

via IFTTT



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 06:25AM by fiplefip http://ift.tt/1IETJ6x FreeStuffNYC

Scrap Metal for pickup for free (Mamroneck NY) FreeStuffNYC

Scrap metal available for pickup: refrigerator, stove, kitchen sink, kitchen hood, some piping and other metals (e.g., car jack, etc.). Disconnected and ready to go.

from Craigslist http://ift.tt/1MHG8Gq

via IFTTT



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 04:52AM by fiplefip http://ift.tt/1YPoEEy FreeStuffNYC

Preparing a whole Ham to eat in portions? AskCulinary

Hello,

I recently became the proud owner of a Hardwood Smoked - Our Family - Spiral Bone-In Ham (picture: http://ift.tt/1OrSNOX ) and have several questions about it. The Ham is currently in my refrigerator and weights 11.5 lbs.

  • How can I best divide it into several portions that I can freeze and reheat when needed. Divide first, then cook or cook first, then divide? It seems like there is a bone inside, so dividing first would be kinda difficult. I'm thankful for any tips regarding this.
  • Is this ham pre-cut?
  • Is this ham pre-cooked?
  • What does spiral mean?

I found this receipt: http://ift.tt/1ewnW2U , will it work for my kind of Ham?

Thank you very much for you help, I appreciate it!



Submitted December 30, 2015 at 09:16AM by 0x9EB02C6F http://ift.tt/22z5wd7 AskCulinary

Frequently Asked Questions appliancerepair

Dear friends, in my today’s post I would like to cover all the frequent questions, which I am asked by our customers, so everybody can find the answer to his question quickly.

Q: How to reach Best Fresno Appliance Repair?

A: To reach us, call (559) 478-2040, or schedule service, using the contact form on http://ift.tt/22z5wd3.

Q: What kind of home appliances are you servicing?

A: We service all kind of home appliances in Fresno area and Clovis- refrigerators, trash compactors, gas ovens, washing machines, and more.

Q: Are you servicing small home appliances?

A: No, we are concentrating more on servicing bigger home appliances, like dishwashers, washing machines, trash compactors, refrigerators, etc.

Q: Which brands are you servicing?

A: We are servicing all major brands, existing in the market. The basic technology for all brands is the same. For the full list of brands, which we are supporting, visit http://ift.tt/1TqtGjO.

Q: What is the approximate/average cost for a kitchen appliance repair?

A: Depending on the appliance, and the volume, the average repair costs are between 100-200-250 USD.

Q: Are you providing appliance spare parts?

A: Yes, we are providing appliance spare parts in most cases.

Q: Who do you buy your parts from?

A: We buy the spare parts from Marcone Supply and Coast Supply.

Q: Are there special discounts and special prices?

A: We are very flexible and provide our customers special prices and discounts, e.g we give 10% discount for online customers and senior citizens.

Q: Are there diagnostic fees?

A: We charge an initial diagnostic fee of 45 USD.

Q: How long does it take the technician to visit the customer?

A: We are responding immediately. Our technicians visit the customer just after the order is placed.

Q: Are your technicians certified?

A: Yes, our technicians are certified by competent authorities. We regularly train our technicians, so they acquire new skills and learn to service appliances with the latest technology. Read more…

Q: How to make home appliances work longer?

A: For tips on home appliances preventive maintenance check out this blog. Here you will find useful tips and tricks, e.g.: http://ift.tt/1HPacoh

Q: Is there a warranty for the replaced spare parts?

A: Yes, we offer 90 days warranty on all new spare parts. Besides, customers get a 30 day trial period for the repaired appliances.

If there are questions, that I haven’t covered now, feel free to ask them by contacting me directly at (559) 478-2040, by writing feedback on our website http://ift.tt/1TqtIs9

Alternatively search for Best Fresno Appliance repair on Facebook, on twitter and LinkedIn.



Submitted December 30, 2015 at 05:51PM by applianceservices http://ift.tt/1OxtWPX appliancerepair

Losing a client nosleep

One of the passions I have in life was psychology. I took an intro to psychology class in high school, mainly for the college credit, and I was hooked. I loved ever thing about it. That spark grew into a flame that led to me becoming a therapist. I wanted to help people and I was fascinated by mental illness. I had a particular liking to the processes behind schizophrenia. Or rather the lack of understanding behind the processes. I wanted to work with them mainly doing individual therapy despite it being somewhat ineffective at times. Hearing the delusions and hallucinations only grabbed my attention the more I worked with these individuals. But the farther I got in my career the more I thought would grow in my head. What if someone suffering from schizophrenia was telling the truth and no one was listening because “they just have schizophrenia.” I have to admit at times it was difficult to tell what was true and fiction.

An example of this would be a client of mine would had schizophrenia and was not very med compliant. He never wanted to take his medications which can be common. Once during my weekly home visit he stated that his nurse visited and told him he didn’t need to take these medications anymore as he gestured towards two medications bottles on his counter. We’ll say my clients name is Steve. “Steve you know you can’t just go off your medications. Do you remember what happened last time, how bad you felt? And your delusions grew in intensity pretty quick.” He was persistent that they his nurse had visited and told him he didn’t need to take them anymore. Steve came from a very remote part of Russian and was trying to start his new life. I wanted him to succeed in that goal. Get a job, hell maybe even a family. Frustrated with him I called his doctor to double check, like I said some of the delusions were actually true and it is always good to confirm what a client tells you. His doctor told me that he had sent the nurse practitioner over for a home visit and there were indeed medications that he did not need to take anymore. This was actually good news since he was already on a cocktail of antipsychotics and other meds. I hung up the phone and apologized. “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you Steve.”

We would meet for weekly sessions. Most of the time it is difficult to get someone in active phases of schizophrenia to engage in any sort of reality based conversation depending on their condition. With Steve this was no different. He only wanted to talk about superficial things. His voice is often raspy and deep due to years of cigarette smoking. “Did you watch the football game?”

“I’ve told you quite often that I don’t watch football. How are you feeling since the discontinuation of the meds?”

“I feel fine. I always feel fine. Nobody ever believes me.”

“We’re are all just trying to help you, Steve. We want you to get better so you can see and be the best person you can.”

Despite multiple attempt to get him to gain insight into his mental illness he never would. I would try to discuss his past history of auditory hallucinations that he suffered from when he was in Russia. He would insist that they were not voices and that people would talk to him. “At night when the base was closed. They come out of woods and we sometimes talk till sunrise.” Steve always told people he lived in a cabin alone way out in the woods. He would never say what town it was near because he insisted it was secret since he worked for the government in Russia. All he would say is his cabin was near a military base and he would live near it as full time perimeter security.

“But when you moved here the medications you started helped. The voices stopped remember?”

“The voices stop because I move away from where they were. They know I live here. They gunna come someday.”

A driving factor in Steve moving the US was that his friend was murdered. The authorities thought Steve had done it. When they arrived all they found was a blood trail in the snow leading from his cabin steps out into the woods surrounding the military base. Steve had actually been the one to call the authorities. Upon their arrival he just kept screaming that “they” had taken him. There was an investigation but the body nor any evidence was ever found to convict Steve. During that investigation a full psych workup was completed and due to the people’s voices he kept discussing he was diagnosis with schizophrenia. The investigation was enough to get him fired and he wanted to move to the US so he left. In psychology if someone has two separate auditory hallucinations, such as separate voices talking to them, that warrants a Paranoid Schizophrenia diagnosis automatically. Steve reported hearing 5 voices.

“Steve I want to talk more about these voices you heard on the day your friend was murdered. Do you think you can do that?”

“No.”

I sat in silence hoping the pressure might make him say something more.

“We can’t talk about them. They come find me if we talk about them that is why I moved here.”

“Steve I just want to get a better understanding of what they are like and how they speak to you.”

He just sat and smiled. “They were friendly. They keep me company during the long shifts at the base. During my training I was warned about stuff coming from the woods. But they were so nice why hurt something nice. I had my friend come over that evening so he meet them. They were angry will me. ‘why your bring an outsider!’ They would scream. ‘You have betrayed us’ another say. Then they took him. Killed in front of me and ate him.” Steve was now crying and shaking.

I had a week’s vacation and when I came back Steve took a turn for the worse. He would call my work phone at least three times a day. I don’t answer after work hours unless I know it was an emergency. Steve never called my phone before so I thought I should answer. “Good evening Steve. How are you?”

He was just breathing heavily into the phone. “Steve are you alright?”

“I told you they gunna come. They’re here. Upstairs I can hear them moving around.”

In the past when Steve has become more psychotic he stops eating and taking his medications. I decided I should go over despite it being 9 o’clock. When I knocked on his door he swung it open quickly and I came in. His pill container was on the stand by the couch and it hadn’t been touched for at least 3 weeks. “Steve why haven’t you” “Quiet! They are up there. They found where I live. I told you they gunna find me.”

Something reflective caught my eye. I looked down to see Steve holding a 8 inch kitchen knife. His hands were shaking and he was white knuckle gripping the knife. When you think a client might be dangerous always keep an exit close and a plan to get out. Steve was standing in front of my only exit.

“There is no one upstairs. No one lives there I check myself the other day.”

His eyes were so wide I could see his whole iris. It have him a daunting look. “They up there and they gunna come down here and kill me.”

“Steve I need you to try to breath and relax.” I took out my phone to call 9-1-1. Steve needed to go to the hospital and they knife made it to where he was a danger to himself and to me if I said the wrong thing. As I took my phone out Steve smacked it out of my hand. He didn’t say anything he just stared at me.

“Steve you can’t…”

I heard something upstairs. It sounded like someone dragging a tall lamp with a heavy base across the floor. A metal on wood scraping sound.

Steve smiled, “I gunna get them first.”

Steve turned around and flung open the door. He ran out and I could hear him going up the steps at the rear of the building to the door of the upstairs apartment. I reached down and picked up my phone and hit send on the emergency call. “9-1-1 what’s your emergency?”

“Yea hi I need an ambulance at 632….”

I heard Steve screaming upstairs. It was the loudest I’ve ever heard a man scream. I completely forgot about the call I just ran outside and up the stairs. The door was kicked open and it was dark inside. Steve had stopped screaming but I could hear a gurgling sound. I turned on the flashlight mode on my phone and could hear the operator talking.

“Hello sir? Are you there? Can you speak to me? Sir, I need your address.”

I couldn’t talk. All I could do is walk slowly into the apartment. In the middle of the empty living room I could see a dark shape. When I moved my light to it I could see it was Steve, or rather it should be Steve. He was in a fetal position on his right side facing me. His face was completely cut off. From his chin to the top of his forehead it was just gone. There were his eye holes and his throat which was gurgling blood and air. The knife he had was sticking out of his gut which he was trying to pull out but his hands were covered in too much blood.

I dropped my phone and when I went to grab it I kicked it under the refrigerator. I had to grasp my ears because they were ringing. I slowly began to realize that it was screeching. I was screaming too. I could feel my voice box vibrating but I couldn’t hear my voice over the sound. Just then something ran by me and out the door. It looked furry and hunched over but it was as tall as I am. The sound stopped.

I ran over to Steve. He was no longer breathing. I called to him but there was no movement. I grabbed his phone from his pocket and dialed 9-1-1 again. They came and the cops had to come too. I told them who I was and that I was doing a house call because my client was in crisis. The released the report and his death was ruled a suicide because of the knife. But what about his face. That knife was not sharp enough to just cut his face clean off. I told the police I had arrived and heard him screaming upstairs. I didn’t tell them I saw anything out of fear of them thinking I am mentally ill too.

Sometimes a client can be right. A delusion can only be a delusion if it is false Steve was telling the truth and no one would listen.



Submitted December 31, 2015 at 01:57AM by Letsdiscover http://ift.tt/1OlbN60 nosleep

Looking for some advice on my housing situation in China personalfinance

Alright- so I'll show you both of my current options. Option A and option B:

OPTION A (My current situation)-

Right now I pay $600 a month for a studio in a pretty much brand new building. It's a really nice room, a bit small but I live alone so it's all good. The main issue is that there is construction just outside my room and in China construction goes form 7AM until about 10:30PM. My commute time to work is 30 minutes. If I break my lease I will lose $300.

OPTION B

A friend of mine (former Chinese co-worker) rented out another apartment that he uses on the weekend mornings and some weeknights to teach his students. Apart from this I'd be living alone. It's an older building and my room would be fairly small. I still have access to the rest of the apartment though. Rent here would be $300 a month. This place is only a 2 minute walk to my work. If I move in here I'd have to pay about $300 for a new washing machine and refrigerator

I'm planning to leave China around July

I'm not in debt, but I do enjoy saving money- it's the main reason I moved here. But I also really value my privacy. What would you do?



Submitted December 30, 2015 at 03:49PM by chinainaflash http://ift.tt/1Sm6IvZ personalfinance

How do refrigerators work? NoStupidQuestions

its 4:30 am and i dont know how the coldness in a refrigerator retains its coldness, please help



Submitted December 30, 2015 at 03:59PM by denikez http://ift.tt/1NVrGfP NoStupidQuestions

Tuesday, December 29, 2015

My refrigerator's brand name describes its contents. mildlyinteresting

http://ift.tt/1Vp2zqE

Submitted December 30, 2015 at 10:34AM by DIRTY_CRAPPED_BRIEFS http://ift.tt/1mhABl3 mildlyinteresting

Are you lifting heavy weight but still too fat? Read this. TheRedPill

Summary:

What do you do when you’ve been lifting for a couple years, you’ve bulked up, can put up an impressive amount of weight but you’re still fat?

Body:

You have a gut, your body fat percentage is in the mid to high 20’s (if you’ve even measured it at all) and you have the strength but not the body you’ve been working for?

I had this same problem myself, I learned this shit the hard way, and made the necessary changes. Here are some before and after pics from this year to prove I’m not full of shit.

March 2015: http://ift.tt/1QX5MyW

December 2015: http://ift.tt/1Vp2zai

The problem I’ve found is there is too much generic dieting and training advice like “eat big to get big.” But that doesn’t really mean anything when you think about it. This type of advice also gives off the impression that all you have to do is go to the gym, put up heavy weight and stuff your face silly with food all day long. You’re going to get big alright, big and fat.

This post is for those of you who are putting up the heavy weight but are still too fat. All you really need to do is get organized. The best part is you can look great all year round. No more bulking and cutting phases. There is a middle path and I’m going to show you how to get there.

I’m a firm believer in “what doesn’t get measured doesn’t get improved.”

And that’s exactly what we’re going to do.

Before we get started you are going to need a few things. Chances are you already have these things lying around if you’ve been lifting for a few years:

  • Weight scale (with body fat measurement feature)
  • Measuring tape
  • Food scale
  • Big lunch box
  • Tupperware
  • Microsoft fucking Excel or a notebook

Set your ego aside and measure yourself.

The first step is to weigh yourself and measure your body fat percentage. We need a starting point. Go to Walmart or Target and get yourself a scale with a body fat measuring feature (I found one for $25).

Measure your body parts with measuring tape. If you don’t have one, get one (they are about $1-$2). Get a notebook or an excel spreadsheet and make note of your measurements. Measure your shoulders, chest, stomach, biceps, forearms, legs, calves etc. Google how to measure these parts properly if you need to, there’s a trick to some of them.

Now we have a starting point and we know exactly where we’re at. Don’t forget to track the date too. A good day to do this is on Sunday. Moving forward you will be measuring all of this every week and tracking it.

Set goals

Where do you want to be? How big do you want your arms to be? What body fat percentage do you want? Write down your specific goals.

Nutrition

Now we move on to nutrition. Learn to track your macronutrients (macros). If you don’t know what macros are or are hazy about them, google it now. There are some great resources out there that will explain what they are. I’ll wait. Seriously, go google it.

The first step in mastering your diet is to figure out how much food you need to be eating. And what types of food. Chances are if you are at this level you’re already eating the right types of food. However, if you’re fat or don’t look the way you would like to you are probably eating the wrong proportions or portions of food.

Here is a calculator you can use to get a starting point on the amount of protein, fat, carbohydrates and calories you should be putting into your body based on your age, height, and overall exercise regimen:

http://ift.tt/1M0S3E9

Fill it out and get your results. This will serve as a nutritional starting point. Everyone’s body is different and chances are your actual “maintenance,” “bulking” or “fat loss” metrics will be very different than what the calculator says they’re supposed to be.

Now that we have measured our current state and have a clearer picture of an appropriate food intake we can proceed to the next step: meal preparation.

This is where our excel spreadsheet will be key.

Get your food organized

We’re taking nutritional inventory next. Go through your refrigerator and pantry and make note of all your food. Go through all the nutrition facts and jot down all the macronutrient content of everything you are putting in your body: make a note of the protein, carb, fat and caloric contents of EVERY item. Some foods won’t have nutrition facts like fruits and vegetables. For this, google will be useful. Simply google the food item and you can get the nutrition fact information that way. It won’t be exact but you can get a very close estimate.

This spreadsheet is the main tool we will be using to plan your daily and weekly meals to ensure you are eating the right amount of macros every day. This part is a bit tedious but the good news is you only have to do it once.

Here is a template I use to give you an idea.

http://ift.tt/1Vp2Bik

What I did was set up my macros totals from the calculator recommendations across the top row and subtracted the macros from each food item. I am able to easily add and take away food items to make sure I meet my totals for the day.

Let’s recap before we go any further.

We now have a comprehensive set of measurements of our body parts, weight, and body fat percentage. We also now know how much food we should be putting into our body and what specific foods will allow us to meet our macronutrient requirements on a daily basis.

Meal Preparation System

What you need next is a reliable system to actually get all this food into your body. It comes down to three main steps:

  1. Cook
  2. Measure portions
  3. Eat the food

Cook

The first step is to actually cook your food. I personally like to grill my meats, steak and chicken breasts. The grill adds a lot of flavor without any additives.

Spices are also a great way to add flavor to your food without altering your macros. I like to use a lot of garlic, onions and olive oil when I cook my food. Get some Mrs. Dash powders if you have to.

I generally cook twice a week and I cook in bulk. I keep it simple. I also will make a huge batch of white rice once a week. Sweet potatoes are also great for this. Also, don’t forget to eat fruits and vegetables. They are a great source of carbohydrates and micronutrients (vitamins, minerals, etc.)

Measure portions

Here is where the food scale comes in. The food scale is what we will use to measure our meal portions down to the gram or ounce. This will ensure we are being accurate with our meal planning.

Eat the food

The last step is to find a reliable way to actually eat the food. I’ll leave this part to you. Tupperware containers and a big lunch box are usually a great way to go. Depending on whether you work in an office or go to school or have access to a microwave, etc. you might need to get creative or prepare food that does not need to be reheated yet will provide you with the nutritional content you need. The main thing now is to find a consistent way to put the food in your mouth and swallow it.

High Intensity Cardio

This part is simple. Add the following exercises to your existing routine and ditch the treadmill (google them if you have to):

Hill sprints Sled pushes Shuttle/Suicide drills Car pushes Stairs

The key here is to get your heart beating out of your chest.

Weekly Tracking System

Do all this for a week. Eat the recommended macros from the calculator and measure yourself again the following Sunday (if that was the day you started). Make a note of the changes. If you added too much weight or body fat cut back on the carbohydrates the following week. If you lost weight, add more. If you stayed the same, then you might want to cut back on the carbs anyway since you’re fat right now. There is a trial and error component to this. The goals we set earlier will determine if you're going in the right direction. Patience is your best friend here.

Conclusion:

By measuring your body and tracking your dietary intake on a weekly basis you’ll keep your body fat percentage consistently low while making sure the weight you are gaining is coming from muscle mass. If you can be consistent about this, you will never need to bulk or cut ever again. You will look the way you want to look all year round. You will understand your body moving forward. No more generic “eat big to get big” bullshit.



Submitted December 30, 2015 at 11:30AM by a_chill_bro http://ift.tt/1Vp2zam TheRedPill

Messed up a little bit with VFT refrigerator dormancy, could use some advice. SavageGarden

So this is the first year I've lived in an apartment and had to use the refrigerator method for my VFTs dormancy and I made two lazy mistakes that screwed me up a little bit. I have them in a tupperware in sphagnum with copper based antifungal spay which looks fine and I keep them in a mini fridge at 43 degrees. My first mistake was that right after I dug them up I wanted to ease them into dormancy by sticking them in a window for a couple weeks. One day I went to check on them, realized that the Tupperware created a greenhouse effect so it was super warm inside, so I took the lid off and forgot about it for a day and a half which dried everything out and killed/crisped up the leaves of the ones not buried in spagnum, which I figured wasn't a big deal cause I was gonna probably trim them off anyway and the rhizomes still looked perfectly healthy. Fast forward a couple weeks, I've been checking on them every few days and things look good, notice the sphagnum is a little dry so I spray it down a little bit and then pop it back in the fridge and go home for Christmas for a week. I get back and check on them and it looks like I overdid the moisture, no mold but the stuff that had been dried up is now nasty mushy rotten shit and it's spreading to some of the rhizomes. I immediately trimmed off all the black stuff, gave it a serious wash in water and used a toothbrush to scrub off all the soggy material and let the sphagnum dry out a good bit before putting everything back. Is there anything else I can dobro prevent further die off? Luckily as far as I can tell the only ones effected were the larger typical plants I had, most of the cultivars were in the deeper layers and look good, but it's still a bummer.



Submitted December 30, 2015 at 10:30AM by Fattybitchtits http://ift.tt/1NV953q SavageGarden

What do you get when you cross a railroad with a refrigerator? Jokes

Killed.



Submitted December 30, 2015 at 06:06AM by kbiggs http://ift.tt/1RQuPnb Jokes

Large Duplex DISCOUNTED Avail Now (alameda) $1990 3bd 1500ft2 EastBayHouseSearch

Large Duplex Older property - reduced price !! 2+ bedrooms (1 large, 1 medium, 1 small) 1 full bath new refrigerator gas stove Professionally cleaned Occupants need to supply own heaters big yard (6,000 SF level lot) off-street parking $95/ [...]

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Submitted December 30, 2015 at 04:26AM by u238ed http://ift.tt/1NPc7Zn EastBayHouseSearch

Norman makes a silly mistake lifeofnorman

Norman was in the staff room eating his lunch when Lisa walked in.

"Oh, that smells good!" said Lisa, while walking over to the refrigerator to pull out a diet coke. She then started towards the exit.

"Leftover spaghetti," said Norman with a smile and raised eyebrows. He knew better than anyone how good it smelled, but he didn't like to brag.

"Mmm, well enjoy your spaghetti!" Said Lisa as she left.

"You too!" said Norman without thinking. Realizing his silly mistake, he looked up again quickly to perhaps have a laugh about it with Lisa, but she was already gone.


"You too" thought Norman as he was almost asleep that night.



Submitted December 30, 2015 at 04:57AM by Crabmeat http://ift.tt/1QWoIxR lifeofnorman

I finally understand why teachers are so angry rant

I don't want to give a lot of information away, but I work in a field where I evaluate projects and engineering submissions from subcontracts. Basically, sub-organizations work for my organization to support a larger organization, and it's my job to judge the work that sub-organizations perform. Here's the best way to describe it:

Imagine you're a kindergarten school teacher. You give a kid an assignment to draw a picture of a giraffe in crayon. The next day the kid gives you a water color picture of you and him. Teacher: "Okay, that's umm... Not what you were assigned. What's this yellow marking in between us? Oh... it's a picture of you pissing in my face."

Grade: F-

Then the kid takes the same "art" back to his parents, and they stick it on their refrigerator, put a gold star over the grade, and tell him what a good kid he is and complain to the principle. The principle says that "no child can be left behind" and graduates the mook to first grade anyway.



Submitted December 30, 2015 at 05:08AM by Fubang77 http://ift.tt/1TomsNh rant

Beautiful 4BD/2BTH Beach Home Alameda (alameda) $3695 4bd 1731ft2 EastBayHouseSearch

  • Newly Remodeled Home along Alameda Shoreline! * 4 Bedrooms, 2 Baths * New Hardwood Floor * Newly painted throughout * New Appliances (Stove, Dishwasher, Refrigerator) * Excellent floor plan with separate family and living room area * Bonus pl [...]

    from Craigslist http://ift.tt/1QY2IT6

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Submitted December 29, 2015 at 11:16PM by u238ed http://ift.tt/1mOsfRS EastBayHouseSearch

How can we go back to being frugally minded? Frugal

Hi /R/Frugal!

I've always been a frugal person since childhood, growing up with humble means, my partner grew up a bit more privileged than I did, and we've slowly bridged the gap between us. I leaned more towards his ways as we graduated college, got well-paying jobs, and cared less about finances.

Background: Both of us are college educated and bring home $56K and $73K independently. We both have student loan debt ($24K & $40K remaining), two car loans ($21K and $32K) and purchased a townhome this year ($191K remaining). When we purchased the townhome (new) we splurged a bit buying a new refrigerator, washer and dryer, and furnishings for our home, totaling roughly $15K after all was said and done. We've been in such a spending spell the last year that it's hard to break out of it.

We're not hurting financially, but seeing how much goes out the door each month is shocking, especially considering we're both 24 and very early in our careers.

What are some ways that we can go back to being more frugally minded?

Here are some that I've thought of, and it would be great to get input from others!

  • Sell the townhome to rent or buy a smaller and older house (Property taxes in TX & HOA fees are hefty)
  • Once cars are paid off get used cars as needed with cash
  • Eat at home more (This is hard!)
  • Shop more at second-hand shops and yard sales (my favorite weekend activity)


Submitted December 29, 2015 at 10:09PM by mad1301 http://ift.tt/1ZzDMmm Frugal

Sweetness and ED behaviors xxketo

Like most of us, I'm sure, I have an extremely unhealthy relationship with sugar. I started keto because I consider myself an addict when it comes to carbs, and having a way to cut them down to the lowest number possible and still feel full seems like a godsend. I can't tell you how many nights I've laid in bed beating myself up for eating waaaay more than I planned to and completely losing control around food - almost always sweets of some kind or another. Mind you, this is five years AFTER recovering from years of bulimia.

So there I was yesterday, making myself a very small, very rich birthday cake. (I turn 26 today, yay!) I had to "try" it to make sure it tasted good. Once I had three slivers of that - going back and forth to the refrigerator, pulling it out, having just one more taste - I scraped up a handful of scraps and icing from the pan of cinnamon rolls sitting in the fridge.

Of course, this is nothing compared to my behavior even a few weeks ago. In an effort to combat the shame that comes with secrecy, I sat down on the couch, drank some water, and told my very understanding fiancè what had happened, and that I don't want a birthday cake this year. (He's not LCHF, and wanted to get a backup just in case my baking experiment failed.) I don't feel ready for sweets just yet.

That being said, will I ever be ready? Will I ever be able to have "just one" cookie, or even cook/bake with low-carb sweetener? Right now, I can't imagine a life without waffles on Saturday mornings, or apple pie for Christmas. Of course, I'm thrilled to imagine a life without food-induced guilt and feeling totally out of control. I know no one here has an answer for how this journey is going to go for me, but I'd love some support/commiseration or advice.

How can I change my outlook here to not feel like I'll be deprived from what everyone else can handle, and part of what makes eating enjoyable, for the rest of my life?



Submitted December 29, 2015 at 07:21PM by thatwriterkid http://ift.tt/1MEPpiu xxketo

LPT: Store your Air Jordans in your refrigerator to keep them phresh. ShittyLifeProTips

No text found

Submitted December 29, 2015 at 06:36PM by steppenfloyd http://ift.tt/1mNGJSj ShittyLifeProTips

Picture Dump from 2 years ago. yiff



Submitted December 29, 2015 at 04:19PM by ultrathrowawai http://ift.tt/1mNitzq yiff

/r/Showerthoughts report: Thursday, January 01, 2015 - Monday, December 28, 2015 subredditreports

Totals: lotsa days, 290,784 posts, 1,578,958 comments.
Included in this report: The top 3,000 posts, and 804,985 of the top comments, by 356,842 distinct authors.
There were 192 gilded posts, and 573 comments were gilded.


See the comments for detailed reports and charts.


Most Popular Posts


Score Author Post Title
33046 /u/jgam7 Waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay sounds super rad if you don't know what either of those things are.
14310 /u/HansOlavLee The object of golf is to play the least amout of golf.
13066 /u/kellenbrent April Fool's Day is the one day of the year when people critically evaluate news articles before accepting them as true.
12404 /u/unfinished_usernam I have never once hit the space bar while watching a YouTube video with the intention of scrolling halfway down the page
11792 /u/The_JayMo Last night my friend asked to use a USB port to charge his cigarette, but I was using it to charge my book. The future is stupid.
11490 /u/firstrival Websites should post their password requirements on their login pages so I can remember WTF I needed to do to my normal password to make it work on their site
10808 /u/Eye_Decay There should be confetti in tires so when there is a blow out it's still kind of an okay day
9818 /u/ThisisGolems Senior citizen discounts should just round dollar amounts down so we don't have to wait in line behind them while they dig for change.
9721 /u/anonymoos_user In the future, imagine how many Go-Pros will be found in snow mountains containing the last moments of peoples lives.
9190 /u/MKLV Of all the bodily functions that could be contagious, thank god it's the yawn.
9178 /u/electrovert There should be an app like tinder but for jobs. Like hey you have 42 jobs that meet your qualifications near you. Then the company can swipe left for awful applications.
9136 /u/Throw13579 Your dog doesn't know you can make mistakes. When you trip over him in the dark, he thinks you got up just to kick him in the head.
8804 /u/specialservices If Leonardo Dicaprio ever wins an Oscar, he should pull out a dusty piece of paper and do an acceptance speech as if it's from 1993
8375 /u/veritate_valeo I used hola unblocker to watch Argo on the Canadian Netflix. I was an American who had to pretend to be Canadian to watch a movie about Americans who have to pretend to be Canadians making a movie.
8365 /u/CornerDealie Now that cellphones are becoming more and more waterproof, pretty soon it will be okay to push people into pools again.
8279 /u/halohitz Almost every hand I've ever shaken has had a dick in it.
8152 /u/Air_Hellair "DO NOT TOUCH" would probably be a really unsettling thing to read in braille.
7997 /u/TheAbjectLol Maybe if we announce that Buzzfeed's shutting down, Buzzfeed will announce that it's shutting down.
7855 /u/Have_One Is it crazy how saying sentences backwards creates backwards sentences saying how crazy it is?
7775 /u/iftherewasanotherway If you swap the spinach for beer, then any episode of Popeye becomes a bitter story of a raging alcoholic, right down to the speech impediment and tendency to fight people who he believes are trying to steal "his girl"
7750 /u/ComicSansIsAwsome Since smart watches can now read your pulse, there should be a feature that erases your browser history if your heart stops beating.
7749 /u/papertank17 The best item to protect you from sasquatch attacks is a camera.
7646 /u/JohannesP Becoming an adult feels like slowly being put into a managerial position you didn't really want
7602 /u/mrmoo524 There should by a gym where the membership fee is extremely high at the beginning of the month but you earn money back for every day you end up going and working out for at least an hour.
7594 /u/bmg1001 We should have a holiday called Space Day, where lights are to be shut off for at least an hour at night to reduce light pollution, so we can see the galaxy.
7571 /u/rsahk Netflix is like a refrigerator full of food but with nothing I want to eat.
7475 /u/positivemark My 18 month daughter has reached the intelligence level of The Sims. She can move around, clap at random things and make garbage sounds but everything else we have to direct her to do.
7473 /u/Brinner Bushing your teeth is the only time you clean your skeleton
7422 /u/Cosmo_120 Making fun of a fat person at the gym is like making fun of a homeless person at a job fair.
7416 /u/makeitrayne My debit card pays for things with past hours of my life, and my credit card pays with future hours of my life.
7379 /u/Dewut Mr. Incredible and Elastigirl got really lucky when they named their son Dash as they had no way of knowing he'd have super speed as a superpower.
7351 /u/gridster2 If Goldilocks tried three beds, then Momma Bear and Daddy Bear slept seperately. Baby Bear is probably the only thing keeping the family together.
7319 /u/MrCSquared Dogs probably destroy shoes because they see humans put them on before they leave the house.
7273 /u/Arpeggi42 If colleges really want to prepare high school students for today's job market then they should only accept students who have "at least 2-3 years college experience".
7168 /u/LatherMeInPoo Vampires only suck your blood for Vitamin D because they can't go out in the sun themselves.
7148 /u/InconspicuousD I read through /r/nosleep yesterday and realized that terrible things only happen to people with excellent storytelling skills.
7121 /u/Sexymcsexalot No 'how I made a million dollars' books include the author starting their journey to wealth by reading a book about how to make a million dollars.
7099 /u/MisterBadIdea2 You can tell that the Flintstones lived a very long time ago because they're a single-income working class family with their own house.
6951 /u/RoninK Facebook is ubiquitous, but has a reputation for low-quality content. It's become the Walmart of social media.
6913 /u/Nabrokovian A bed is a shelf for your body when you are not using it.
6851 /u/Khromulabobulation My activities on the internet are basically the same things I would do if I were a ghost: Listen in on people's conversations, spy on people having sex, and watch whatever movies and concerts I want for free.
6825 /u/foresstguy I turned 18 a half hour ago, I've spent 100% of my adult life on reddit.
6817 /u/swallowing_panda Everyday, someone on Earth unknowingly does the biggest poo in the world for that day.
6815 /u/depressingcarrot every cell in my body knows how to replicate DNA yet I'm not in on it so I have to spend hours studying it
6786 /u/xixi2 Facebook shares are just the new "Fw: Fw: fw: Fw: Fw:" of stupid images and jokes
6709 /u/NumberZtv "He died doing what he loved" would be a horrible thing to say at a drug addicts funeral.
6690 /u/chrono1465 Having a toddler is like being on a permanent escort mission: A low AI character tries to follow you around, and if you're not careful enough, they'll find a way to kill themselves.
6671 /u/ChefBoyarE Dora calls herself an "explorer," but travels exclusively through mapped territories
6624 /u/throwpillo Cowboys that ride off into the sunset quickly run out of daylight and have to camp just outside of town. Probably should've just stayed put for the night instead of being all dramatic.
6560 /u/Fatchine I used to set up a SINGLE song downloading on limewire OVERNIGHT and bask in the glory of it the next day, now if I click a gif link that doesn't load within a couple of seconds I cancel it and move on.
6548 /u/WADERMELON If people who hate minions subscribe to /r/MinionHate, it fills their front page with even more minions.
6543 /u/kirk_is_ That Google Chrome "what tab is being noisy?" speaker icon should function as a mute button.
6541 /u/youstinkbitch You never know how many people you dislike until you have to name your child
6515 /u/Offjacker Porn sites should enable sorting by the number of people who left the website after watching the video
6451 /u/salvisa You should be able to yell "BE RIGHT THERE" to your phone and since it knows you're coming, it gives you a few extra rings before sending the user to voicemail.
6433 /u/flipmosquad Cellphones should have 2 passwords for unlock, one which would be for you and unrestricted.. the other would be for you parents/friends that wouldn't show awkward applications/photos
6404 /u/GhostOfPluto Coming from a big family, I don't know what is more sad - That one of us will have to go to seven funerals, or that one of us won't have to go to any.
6400 /u/producerdan You know you're an adult when your house makes noises and you're scared it's an expensive repair bill and not a monster.
6373 /u/Frustratinglyshortna If someone farts at a poker tournament, no one will ever know who did it.
6346 /u/iZacAsimov I don't get why people are upset we haven't invented hover-boards by 2015 when according to the same movie, we should've had a time machine back in in 1985.
6299 /u/Champs27 Because telescopes work using mirrors, we'll never know if there are any space vampires.
6299 /u/SinisterKid I drive safer when there's food on my passenger seat than when there's a person sitting there.
6281 /u/Jayfeather69 To the dinosaurs, we live in a post-apocalyptic future.
6230 /u/BaronVonTittySlapper All males strive to "be the man" while avoiding "being that guy".
6227 /u/TheShamz When I was a younger person I had to use the Oxford dictionary to understand adult words and now that I'm an adult I have to use urban dictionary to understand younger people words.
6226 /u/chp2001 Adblock should buy out signs around time square and replace them with "This ad has been blocked by Adblock"
6211 /u/HolloH We use sex to sell everything. We arrest those who buy and sell actual sex.
6182 /u/KidMemphis_IV Bruce Wayne's parents being murdered was the best thing that ever happened to Gotham
6173 /u/peacesreese Someone should use screen recording software to record an entire day's worth of working on spreadsheets and post it to YouTube so that I can play it full screen and pretend like I'm working.
6145 /u/credible_hulk I spent my early 20's trying to get new games to play on old computers and I spent my late 30's trying to get old games to play on new computers
6141 /u/BrandonThe As a bald, hairy man, I should probably shampoo my body and use body wash soap on my head.
6139 /u/SPESSMEHRINE If two pregnant women get into a fist fight, it's like a mech battle between two fetuses.
6124 /u/firkin_slang_whanger I would like to give thanks to the brave men and women who died a long time ago tasting which plants were edible and which plants were not.
6113 /u/ShaolinMaster We need a Boy Scouts for adult men. I'd love to go camping, hunting, & fishing and learn about nature with like-minded individuals.
6103 /u/aclayhutchings Art is how we decorate space; music is how we decorate time.
6101 /u/Dirtyuniform I spent seven hours vividly hallucinating then I woke up and ate the meat of other animals for energy, now i'm going to do something I don't want to for eight hours for pieces of paper.
6087 /u/Zwall_ Your future self is watching you right now through memories.
6061 /u/Stabler86 I'm bored when I listen to a song from my personal music library, but when it's played on the radio I get excited like it's the greatest song ever.
6040 /u/lolexplode At age 30, you've spent a month having birthdays.
6036 /u/nXanadu In a 500-day period I could theoretically meet someone, get married, have a baby, and get divorced--and yet I'd still be using the same box of Q-tips.
6036 /u/gouldsplosions There should be a website where you can sign up and swap your Halloween costume with another person every year to save yourself money.
6011 /u/oaktownraider13 "I sold an hour of my life for $13" doesn't sound nearly as good as "I make $13/hour."
5994 /u/TurkeyTurrds Reddit is the only place where I've learnt to not trust the article headlines and instead expect a stranger in the comments to tell me the truth
5985 /u/Sac_Man10 The missing Malaysia flight 370 is exactly what the show "Lost" would've looked like from the rest of the world's POV.
5943 /u/KoreTen It's hard to win an argument with a smart person, but it's damn near impossible to win an argument with a stupid person.
5933 /u/hseidema Nothing says "top of the food chain" like squid-ink calamari pasta: you're eating another animal, and seasoning it with its defense mechanism.
5913 /u/afkurzz The fact that Google autocompletes all of my questions is an affirmation of how unoriginal all my problems are.
5909 /u/Old2blue I am more responsible with the resources I have in video games than I am with the resources I have in real life.
5908 /u/eaglesforlife Facebook's list of "suggested friends" is quite literally a list of people I've been avoiding my entire life.
5901 /u/portuguesesteel Between pens and lighters, Bic is making a fortune off of people losing their products.
5887 /u/Fuckminsterfullerene The first eighteen years of your life are like a free trial, and after that it's pay to play.
5885 /u/AbeLincolnsFreckles Touch-free soap dispensers are pretty pointless if the soap actually works.
5884 /u/cliffordcat Victoria is living the dream we all have when we get fired - that the company that fired us will instantly and fantastically fall apart.
5876 /u/whattheflark53 Letting your date use your phone charger, even though you're at 25%, is the 21st century equivalent of putting your coat over a puddle.
5871 /u/spikejr5342 Google maps should have a "Scenic!" route option for when we're not in a hurry and just want to enjoy the ride.
5863 /u/themanfromsaturn Superman's build should be thin and scrawny, because nothing is heavy enough to offer him a proper resistance workout.
5848 /u/ChiefBigwilly Cats are the type of animal that, if they could, they would correct your grammar.
5845 /u/Why--Not--Zoidberg I just now realized the connection between the words "timid" and "intimidate"
5842 /u/HoserUSC The Simpsons has been on the air long enough that I've stopped identifying with the kids and started identifying with the adults
5828 /u/delitomatoes Batman is a 1 percenter beating up the mentally ill.
5800 /u/YabbilyDoobily After clearing your browser history, there should be an option to have it filled with random 'normal' websites, instead of it being all empty.
5789 /u/Theraininafrica Reddit is like riding a bus. Everybody is talking at the same time so you can't make out anything good and on the rare occasion you hear someone talk about something interesting, that you could contribute to, it is too late and that part of their conversation is over.
5783 /u/caseystrain "I work for one of the richest companies in the world" sounds a lot better than "I work at Walmart"
5783 /u/BigBeardius I wish I could see a woman that I know is equally as attractive as I am so I know how attractive I am to the opposite sex
5776 /u/AprilLudgate-Dwyer The only reason that "shower thoughts" is even a thing is because showering is one of the very rare times that it is impossible to have your face buried in the Internet, thus enabling your capability for abstract and creative thought.
5775 /u/itemforty Every paper towel commercial reminds me that the cleanest solution is to just not have children.
5755 /u/ladyoboe I never realized how short a month is until I started paying rent
5744 /u/UtbildadNinja If you rip a hole in a net, there's actually fewer holes in it than it was before
5734 /u/darkdoggy We put clocks in our mobile phones, so we didn't need to look at watches. Now we put mobile phones in our watches so we don't need to look at our mobile phones.
5733 /u/ThePittsburgher Having Facebook, there is no more reason to have high school reunions, you already know what people are up to and you still don't care.
5704 /u/switchtrip16 While Apple's new campus is being built, I wonder how many jokes have been made about "installing windows"
5702 /u/jmk4422 I'm quitting smoking because my niece told me that she wants me to "be around as long as possible". If I get hit by a bus tomorrow I am going to be so pissed off that I fell for her sentimental crap.
5695 /u/ksnid3r Babysitting is a way for teenagers to feel like adults while adults go out to feel like teenagers.
5690 /u/Auvious The moral of Rudolph the Red nose reindeer is that no one likes you unless you're useful.
5688 /u/davpurr The Assassin's Creed series is going to run out of time periods where it's normal to have large piles of hay lying around.
5686 /u/Drowfire Homeless people should relocate to local Best Buy, Toys R Us, Walmart locations for the holidays. Get line for Black Friday. Then sell their spot in line on Thanksgiving night.
5665 /u/cynthiadangus I don't appreciate the time that I don't have a cold nearly enough as I should.
5663 /u/portajohnjackoff i have never seen a blind person reading a public braille sign
5656 /u/Tommy84 If I save up all my dryer lint, I could spin it back into yarn and knit myself a sweater that's the average color of my entire wardrobe.
5655 /u/bluon63 The moral of the Ugly Duckling is that everything was ok because he was actually pretty
5647 /u/JeLoc 75% of reddit going dark means this is probably my best chance of ever getting to the frontpage
5640 /u/Itanagon Despite being an "island", Antarctica has no south coast. Only one big North coast.
5635 /u/ViewAskewed By midday browsing Reddit just becomes a game of Which Unclicked Link Sounds the Least Shitty.
5632 /u/Sepiac Our ultimate goal is to make as many people as sad as possible when we die.
5632 /u/CrumbledFingers I swallow my own saliva hundreds of times a day, but the idea of spitting into a cup and drinking it makes me gag.
5623 /u/instantpowdy Nightmares are fucking weird. Your brain is the author, viewer and cinema of a horror movie whose script is probably written as you are viewing it.
5613 /u/mack1128 Scary movies should put high pitched sounds only dogs can hear so your dog will start acting crazy for (seemingly) no reason at the scariest parts.
5610 /u/franchise235 I wonder if the person who fired Victoria will post about it in /r/TIFU?
5608 /u/Mocker-Nicholas As an early 90's child, I'm really glad that a 6 to 15-year-old me couldn't post my thoughts all over the Internet.
5606 /u/BaconSheikh Watching Jeopardy backwards would be about a panel of 3 people asking Alex Trebek questions that he always gets right.
5593 /u/moonman1324 For Halloween, SnapChat should add a person standing in the background only after you take the picture.
5577 /u/ActuallyNotSnoopDogg "Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people" is a quote that discusses people.
5556 /u/pleasantreddit In paintball, you should be allowed to use a paintbrush as a knife.
5555 /u/HumanityZero I can search the entire Internet faster than I can search my computer
5554 /u/u8eR "Taking candy from a baby" would actually be a responsible thing to do.
5543 /u/MordorsFinest Why hasn't anyone strapped some cameras onto a sperm whale? They regularly dive into the deepest parts of the ocean and supposedly fight giant squids.
5539 /u/muffhug Bear Grylls should take the spoiled rich kids from MTV's My Super Sweet 16 to live in the wild and name the show "Grylls Scouts"
5537 /u/XCosmicBananaX In Japan, radiation creates monsters (Godzilla) and in America radiation creates superheroes
5536 /u/shbababa Humans spend the first 18 (or more) years of their lives getting caught up to speed about what the other humans have been doing for the past few thousand years
5533 /u/Stripe_the_Gremlin You never realize how few original Christmas songs there are until you work in retail and have to hear the same 6 songs sung by 10 different people in a 4 hr shift.
5530 /u/get_ripped_boy There are seven year olds in America who have never had a white president
5530 /u/Schindlerz-Fist I've used my driver's license more to buy alcohol than to prove I'm a registered driver.
5518 /u/Toxic_Axon I hope that when Donald Trump dies he gets cremated and the guy working the oven says "You're fired" and laughs.
5509 /u/ArkLuno We should get a notification every time someone attempts to create an account with our username, so we can feel good about ourselves for getting there first
5493 /u/Sir_Bocks The Onion must be pissed because they can't come up with anything about Donald Trump that's funnier than his real life.
5492 /u/toasterdisciple The human body is really quiet for everything it does.
5488 /u/IwishIwereaPineapple Anyone notice the irony behind "hyphenated" and "non-hyphenated"?
5476 /u/graaahh When a browser asks "Would you like to remember this password?" there ought to be a button that says "Only if it works".
5474 /u/lennyoliy If a bigger car implies a smaller penis, and larger shoes imply a larger penis, then clowns must have massive dicks.
5472 /u/Billobatch Casinos should play monopoly with actual money


Submitted December 29, 2015 at 04:24PM by subredditreports http://ift.tt/1PuonAM subredditreports