Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Two days before Christmas, 2015. AKA Christmas Eve Eve. Also cancer venting. TheMixedNuts

It's early, but that's no reason not to post yet.

I slept well, which was an accomplishment given I've been weaning myself off sleep aids. Two nights ago replaced doxylamine with a higher dose of melatonin, last night had 2mg instead of 3mg.

My dad is on the phone to get his work login sorted out (yes, probably terminal cancer and he's working two days before Christmas). He has the phone on speaker and it's annoying as shit. He is planning on going on disability shortly after Christmas, but his benefits go up significantly as he reaches his 15 year mark just after Christmas, so he's been putting off going on disability until then. His boss, thank the flying spaghetti monster, has been incredibly kind and kept him on payroll despite his terrible inability to contribute much, even before the cancer diagnosis, and especially after the diagnosis. It was probably his boss' idea to wait to go on disability until his benefits go up significantly.

We'd been worried he'd been so exhausted at work he had probably been napping and it was impeding his job security (he's our primary source of income), but everyone starts being nice when they hear pancreatic cancer. I'm sort of thankful for that. The pity though, it kind of hurts. And I'm sick of everyone bringing food. I know part of it is the holidays and all, but our refrigerator and freezer are stuffed and we have no room for this crap. And what can stay outside them are baked goods, and god knows my diet doesn't need that. And his being on the phone to reset his password for work is stressing me out.

I'm not sure if I should be giddy for Christmas presents in two days or just anxious because he's so sick.

And I'm losing focus, so I'll just leave it at that.

Edit: HOW'RE YOU? TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DAY!



Submitted December 23, 2015 at 07:37PM by scurius http://ift.tt/1IqgKKu TheMixedNuts

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