I have a roommate who we'll call "Sarah". Sarah is not an inherently awful person, but she is the archetype of a lazy ham. Sarah is the kind of person who complains about having to unlock the doors when she comes home because it is, apparently, incredibly difficult to retrieve keys from your pocket when you have butter soaked sausages for fingers. Basically, she's the type of person who complains at the most minor of inconveniences.
The pinnacle of this laziness however, is in Sarah's decision to quietly and without consulting with me, begin turning off the refrigerator every night while I'm asleep. Why would someone do this, you may ask? Because, being winter, she sometimes wakes up to find her sodas partially frozen. Because she can't drink them right away and must suffer the agony of another 10 minutes without sugar waiting for the slush to thaw, she has instead decided that it's best to put me at risk of foodborne illness so that she can have something to drink.
Now granted, the refrigerator is a bit temperamental. I've sometimes gone to make breakfast to find my eggs partially frozen through. But I accept that as a minor tradeoff for not turning into a catherine wheel of sick and poo. I've tried calmly explaining the danger of improperly refrigerated food. I've even tried to offer a few solutions to her problem. I've turned the thermostat down, tried moving the sodas lower in the fridge and away from the vent. But almost every morning for the past few weeks I have still woken up to slowly warming fridge and milk of questionable quality. Whats worse is she then complains that the soda is too far down and she gasp has to bend down to pick one up. The horror!
There's no way I can passively prevent this, as I'm usually in bed by around midnight, while she stays up into the small hours of the morning playing video games. I'm about to start storing everything in the freezer before I go to sleep.
Submitted December 25, 2016 at 01:52AM by ham_overdrive http://ift.tt/2hcT7rF fatpeoplestories
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