I just moved in with my girlfriend, she's 33, I'm in my late 30s and she said she couldn't really move, because she had her daughter (16) who wanted to stay. Well, now I know what she means, since I've moved in, I've only seen her daughter a select few times. When she goes to use the bathroom or to school and I have to really be aware if I want to catch her because she leaves her room and right out the door.
I don't know what happened at school, but she's starting to skip, she's been skipping since Thursday. Her mom told me she does this sometimes. And if you ask through the door, she'll say she quit school. Well, I kind of want to fix her whole, never leave her room thing. My girlfriend gave me the key to her daughter's door in case of emergencies or something. So I tried to visit so I could meet her and maybe just try to be her friend, hope she isn't scared of me or anything. So I knocked and called out through her door and we talked for a bit, mostly me just asking why she doesn't come out so often, eventually I asked to come in, and she asked where her mom was, so I said she gave me the key. She yelled at her mom, who had already left the house to go grocery shopping.
I tried to be a dad, tried to get her to listen, so I said, I won't take no for an answer, you can't stay in your room all day you have to get out sometimes. I should have listened to her saying wait, but she was in her room so I just expected her to be trying to stay. I said I'm letting myself in, I'm not going to let you live your life in a room forever, and when I opened the door she was reaching in her drawer for some clothes... In her underwear. I closed the door as fast as I could. All I could do is scream why the hell are you naked. And she says she it's comfortable in her privacy.
I went down to the living room and tried to burn her image from my brain, she came out to speak to me over the rail saying I can come in. So I went up back too her room and I see why she stays all the time, she had a refrigerator in her room, her tv was also a computer monitor, maybe 30 or 40 inches, she had all those consoles the new 4s and and other one. I was impressed well more like with the stuff she had not her staying here, she just said its all so she can do days without leaving her room.
Which brought me right on topic. I wanted to talk to her about how she shouldn't stay in her room all day and she assumed it was because of school, but I told her that it'd be better if the family went out together places. (I hoped that that would give me points since I said not now on her school comment make her believe that isn't why I'm here) so we talked awhile, kind of felt like I was bonding with her, she even served me tea from her fridge. I felt like I made progress, that if she was before she isn't really scared of me now and maybe that was the reason she'd not be seen around the house. But no, it may have been progress, but still at the end of the day she's been in her room all day. I don't know what more I can do on my own. My girlfriend has kind of accepted this behavior already. And it isn't bad, I just think she's wasting a lot of her life.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, I need a few ways to get her to leave her room and not live in it. Also to get her back to school which starts tomorrow morning. I want to try to bring this family together, have a close happy family that can sit and watch movies together, go out to eat together, sit at the table together. Anyone have any ideas I can try?
To shorten this, basically my girlfriend's daughter doesn't leave her room, since I moved in, I want to bring the family together, what are ways I can make this family closer and get the daughter out of her room?
Submitted October 03, 2016 at 09:36AM by iseverythingtookshit http://ift.tt/2do8bDw Advice
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