Office Pantry Etiquette Advice Advice

Hello! Allow me to provide some background into the advice I'm looking for (tl;dr at the bottom):

Three different departments just moved into the nearby offices on the floor of my department's building. What was once just our pantry is now shared with two of the three departments (one dept. has their own new pantry). The pantry consists of a refrigerator, toaster oven, microwave, coffee machine, table with 4 chairs, and a water cooler (no sink). There's been a lot of tension lately because the other departments have been taking their lunch inside the pantry and closing the door. Many of my coworkers say they feel uncomfortable trying to get coffee or grab their lunch from the fridge because when they open the door, other people are talking loudly, stop to stare at you, then stay silent or snicker quietly among themselves.

Some of my coworkers want to put a sign saying not to close the door, while others don't mind if the other departments want privacy. I was asked for my opinion, but didn't answer right away because I don't want to create any hostility towards anyone. How would you handle this situation?

tl;dr: My department's small pantry is now shared by two other departments and they close the door making us feel like we're not allowed in. Would you feel the same way and what would you do, or not care/leave it alone?

Submitted January 23, 2018 at 01:12AM by Travisceral http://ift.tt/2DXWhN5 Advice

I will be in Lakewood, NJ for 3 months and I don't know where to stay Advice

Hey guys, I will be heading to the USA for 3 months to Lakewood in New Jersey area to work on clients site and I have no idea where can I stay.

I know of a hotel nearby but I really would like to have a kitchen and refrigerator so I dont need to buy a meal 6times a day. Does anyone know of any good option?

I am willing to walk 1h to work or take a train and walk I dont care much. Money isnt issue but it shouldnt be over expensive. --- I am willing to stay with family that might be looking for someone and some "free" money as long as I can use kitchen etc.

Any helps where I can look for anything like this?

Thanks!

Submitted January 19, 2018 at 12:15AM by allmeiti http://ift.tt/2rnU5fe Advice

Feeling very unhappy with every aspect of my life, but feel like I can't change anything [LONG] Advice

Let me give some quick background into my life of the last 6 months.

Last June, I finished high school, and my family and I all moved to a smaller city 2 hours away from where I've lived my whole life. We've all talked about moving here for years - we have some family here, the university I'm now attending is here, everything's cheaper than the big city we were in before, etc.

My brother did not want to move - he's two years younger than me and very fragile. He's also midway through high school and had to leave all his friends. My mother is a very high-strung, immature, scary individual. She's narcissistic and oblivious to the cruel ways she treats everyone, and denies the verbal and emotional abuse she's put my brother and I through for years, no matter how much I tell her she should see a therapist. My dad doesn't live with us - my parents have been divorced for 8 years now, though my father also lives in this new small city because his girlfriend lives here.

Anyway. We moved here 6 months ago, at the end of July, and have been living with my uncle ever since. My mom doesn't want to buy a house yet because she thinks house prices will go down 'in the new year' (so, hopefully soon). My uncle has always lived alone and is a strange, antisocial man. He hardly associates with anyone and prefers to sit inside for days watching tv by himself. Despite us now having crashed at his place for half a year, my mom mocks him, complains about everything he does and screams at him for not living a 'normal life'. For some reason, he doesn't say anything to stop her.

I don't want to complain too much about the living situation, because I'm very grateful that my uncle has let us live here so long already. That said, his house is very old and dirty, and I (18, F) have to share a bed with my 50 year old mother. My brother has to sleep in a spare room with his bed beside a refrigerator. Everything in this house is at least 60 years old. It's not ideal.

Because of the fragility of my brother, the abusiveness and carelessness of my mother, the lack of social aspect with my uncle, distance of my father, and total lack of friends since we've just moved to a new place, I've been feeling pretty damn lonely and stressed all the time. To make matters worse, my mother and uncle are very religious - to the point of being homophobic and mildly racist. I am an LGBT individual so this makes me especially uncomfortable.

I haven't had a job in months, and haven't had a relationship in over a year and a half. I know that my marks are going to be bad as a result of my stress and I fear my parents' reactions when they see them, but I cannot bring myself to focus on my schoolwork. January also marks the 2 year anniversary of me trying to kill myself, which has worsened my depression further. What can I do to lessen my stress and change my situation?

Submitted January 11, 2018 at 03:02AM by shaiapitou http://ift.tt/2moka8R Advice

How long should I heat up General Tso’s chicken? Advice

So it’s been in the refrigerator for about 18 hours, at about 35°. The weather outside is fine, but I doubt that makes a difference. The chicken is about 18 and a half hours old. Obama did 9/11. I am using a standard microwave, I guess. I’m sorry, I don’t know much about microwaves.

Thanks!

Submitted January 07, 2018 at 08:38PM by Whiskey_in_the_jar-o http://ift.tt/2F96iqJ Advice

Advice about my fiance's extremely mentally ill mother across the country Advice

My fiance's mother is extremely mentally ill and her family cut off communication when he was a child, leaving her to horribly mentally and physically abuse he and his sisters. She was in and out of institutions when her family was in her life but since then (over 20 years) she has been left to herself, refused mental care, never got a job and too prideful and paranoid to apply for government assistance.

She lives in the north east, in a house that was forclosed on years ago with his eldest sister who has developmental disabilities but is somewhat able to be independant (has kept a part time job for 5+ years, has an internet boyfriend in europe who she flew to visit but was not allowed in the country, he visits her but doesnt seem invested in getting her out of the situation, also lives with his mom..) The house has no heat, is full of mold, falling apart. It's a "grey gardens" situation. He just bought them a refrigerator over the phone because he found out they hadn't had a working fridge for months.

He feels very responsible for his mother, at one point spoke of moving her in with us -and I told him I would move out, she's capable of physical violence and did really unspeakable things to him as a kid so..no. Not to mention the regular screaming and belief that the government is after her.. But he can't relieve himself of the guilt for her situation because she is family. Family is very important to him, because his is so broken I guess. We are both poor, mid twenties service industry workers, we can't afford to support her and his sister, but he feels like a horrible person for not being able to rent them an apartment, buy them groceries, etc.

He thinks if she is put in a state institution (which he thinks is likely because the neighbors are constantly calling the cops on her for various crazy shit, and the other day she told him other state workers came to the house to check on their living conditions) she will DEFINITELY be abused and raped, held captive, etc and it would be all his fault. But she will 100% not survive on the streets either and it's only a matter of time before they are kicked out of the house they're squatting.

If she won't apply for gov. assistance, if his sister wont/cant get a full time job so that they can eat/heat the home/ move and no one IRL cares about either of their well being except for him...what can we even do? I hate watching him suffer with feeling guilty for the situation his mother created for herself (well, as responsible as you can be with extreme mental illness), but I also don't think sending her money will help, and I absolutely am not willing to move them in with us and support them completely, not that we would afford to even fly them to visit.

What options are there for finding help on her behalf? Or..how can I help him to realize none of this is actually his responsibility even if "she's my family!!" I feel so powerless and confused.

Submitted December 18, 2017 at 08:28AM by Margauxstarship http://ift.tt/2AMrVL0 Advice

Should I continue with this girl or is she playing games with me? Advice

We basically met online, her and I wasn't that close but we did spend 2 years together in a group chat. Everything was fine and dandy till late after a year, the group and her argued a lot. There was maybe 12 or more friends together so it made sense they disagreed but most of them started to really hate her and thus people who were more friendly with her would stop talking to her. That led to a big fight in which she left and no one spoke to her again. Then months later she messaged a few of the people in the group and one of them invited her back.

This time she was very sensitive and didn't last very long but developed a closer friendship with me. Through chats we talked days and hours about everything. Her sex life, families, jobs, games, flirting, etc. We got closer than ever and from there we can skip to the present.

Skip to the present

The third year she has mentioned the chat often maybe hoping I'd reinvite her to it again, even flat out admitting it once but lately she's dropped the idea. Instead we're pretty good now, in fact, she told me she got a house a month ago and I joked around about her letting me come over and believe it or not she recently agreed and said I should come over when we were having a flirtatious conversation.

So I did, I drove to her state and went to her house. I got there at maybe 10AM. She opened up wearing her sexy sleepwear she would always tease me over chats with. No bra with a tank top and short shorts that showed a bit of the bottom of her ass. She told me she was flat but she was exaggerating, her tits were fine, but her ass was so nice. I couldn't take my eyes off it.

Her apartment was surprisingly messy and had a bit of a bad smell but when she led me to her room it smelled worse. I don't think she could tell because she sat on her bed trying to still be sexy. There were flies buzzing around and A LOT of roaches in her room. There were literally roaches on her bed or at least picture this.

Her covers weren't exactly fixed, which led me to believe she was under the covers before I got there, I noticed a few roaches crawling from under her covers onto her pillows.

It was kind of gross... but I didn't mind it much since I was with her in person. The only thing that did sort of bother me was a pile of old clothes she had in the corner. She told me she slept naked which is why she barely had anything on besides the tank and short shorts. I sort of imagined her pulling those out of her dirty pile of clothes considering the flies she kept waving off herself. I know she didn't smell though, she even told me she showered last night. But her room seriously needed to be cleaned, it looks like she had a small trash in there full of soda cans and food so I'm guessing I woke her up way too early.

She ignored the bugs and pretended they weren't there so I did as well. It was about 2 hours in now and we were just talking, she sat under her covers and I sat at the edge of the bed. I did want to try to get out of the house at one point and go somewhere more romantic like out to eat, but she actually said she cooked. Then tried to brag that she can cook pretty well as if she wanted to impress me. It was chicken in the refrigerator and she warmed it up, she also had flies and roaches in the kitchen but she ignore them again. This time it was actually gross, because while she tried to keep me talking and interested, a few flies would fly on her food and she'd wave it off and still be eating it. The chicken wasn't that good tbh, it tasted really dry, but I told her it was nice.

So we stayed and after about 4 hours I stop noticing the smell. It was like it went away for me. Which I expected she probably has been in the house so long she doesn't smell anything. We started flirting a bit like we do in chats and she was talking all this big game about how I couldn't handle her and how I'd probably cum in less than 15 seconds. We started out teasing and laughing but actually started getting actually horny. She then got all sexy again and walked back to her room saying she was going to change and I was free to come if I wanted, I followed of course and had one last whiff of that smell as I entered her room but again it faded.

She acted a bit more sexy since I followed and sat on her bed stripping off her shorts in front of me. And I was so turned on, I knew she was already hairy but her lips, her pussy lips looked pretty big. It was nothing like porn and in my head I was like this was really happening. Not only was those big, but her nipples were as well. I could see why she said she had no tits because the circle around her nipples covered a lot and she was so fucking hot to me. It's like porn shows every same looking perfect model, but this girl looked so much more real than porn, it was like I was getting even harder just watching. I took my clothes off too and she pulled me to her and said she was so very horny. So I put my head down and ate her out, she smelled a little fishy and tasted salty which was a really good taste for me. I kept going till she wanted me to put it in. So I kissed her a bit before I started, her breath was a bit strong but it was not about to make me change my mind.

I've only had sex once and it was with a virgin as well. We didn't know what we were doing but I'd also hear from people pussy was so tight as if was pulling you in. This girl was loose... like very loose, it wasn't pulling me in. It was press in, easy out. Not only that but all that shit she was talking and she came within the first minute of it. But besides that and her it was so good. I know people was also telling me the right way to do a girl is to make her queef and she was doing that a lot thanks to her already creaming on me.

We switched to so many different positions, she even rode me a few times, I even almost burst to laughter when I was doing her doggy and she accidentally passed gas, it was funny seeing her swear it was a queef and I just couldn't believe how much fun you could have during sex. I was also very satisfied seeing her face twist all up and hearing breath like a gorilla from how good I was, seeing her roll one eye, and the point where she started drooling I felt so confident in myself and proud. Despite how quirky she was I loved her and the sex. It felt great to be inside and love her. It was like I finally had the love of my life and I'm only 23.

I left a little while after and from then online she seems to act like she regretted the whole thing. Her old friends seem to be brought back up by her and they seem to feel she's just a self-centered person who complains too much. I don't see that in her, but I do see how she's not very interested in what I have to say, most of everything I say returns to being about her. She gives advice with herself still talking about herself. I love hearing about her but I just seem to feel something lately that tells me she isn't that interested with me. Even when I try to flirt she shuts it down or seems to brag on how sexy she's being but if I get horny over it, change the topic. I don't know.

I try being cool and friendly but she seems annoyed by me, I don't know if she just doesn't want to talk that day or if she's just not into me anymore. She does seem to message me when she wants something but doesn't really care to keep talking much when I talk about me. She will usually give me one word responses or just change the topic immediately.

Anyone know how to further relationships online? Despite the sex we can only still talk through chats or games. She claims she doesn't pay her phone bill. She also only seemed to invite me over because she was horny one night and told me she wanted me then. Rarely will she message me and if I message her she does seem a bit annoyed and I know even now she's not really responding because I said something dumb and she's lost interest in the conversation. What do I do?

Submitted November 30, 2017 at 11:04PM by EvenKnowWeBothKnow http://ift.tt/2jAaBBx Advice

Dealing with crazy roommate Advice

I've lived with other roommates before. This is the worst roommate experience I've ever had.

In a house filled with 11 boys, the landlady decided to bring in a single girl. I dont have any problem with that in itself, just that the many women she did bring to see the house before did not end up taking the house for whatever reason(s), I think I can understand, they probably saw the house before and thought it was not worth living in (it is not easy for many people). She then started talking to a person who had not seen the house because they were a temporary exchange student who then agreed to take the house ( all this happened solely via email ). I understood how she would be literally an odd one out, so I tried to give her more space from the beginning. Sadly, the feeling was not reciprocated.

The first few days were enough for things to start unraveling.

I was in the bathroom in the morning and was on my way to start my day, she knocked after a while. I told her I'd be out soon. As soon as I got out she told me in a very stern fashion that if I was to use the bathroom for this long I should be done by 8 AM. Previously, when I had lived with other people, we would have basic human decency to actually let the other person finish and only until it was badly urgent would we go as far as knocking. I cant believe I actually have to mention this, this is common sense. I had not seen this sort of entitlement in my life. I apologized (even though I did not need to ) and told her I had woken up a bit late today (again, I pay equal rent as her so I have zero reason to let someone else decide when I can use a resource in the house as long as it is free and I'm not actually not getting in anyone's way). So she went in and used the bathroom, again, this incident is so stupid I literally am facepalming myself having to mention these details myself, she went in and was done in like 5 mins (that means she did not shower nor shit, so I have no idea why she needed to fight me when I actually had class to go to). She did not have any classes (even though she told me she did in the midst of the talking down she gave me) nor any urgency, so I pondered why the reason for the huge fight?

So a few other guys live with me here on this floor along with her. From the beginning, I had sort of already gotten the idea how things would go if god forbid I actually got into a fight with her and said something back, this was proven true later. After the bathroom incident, one of the guy roommates made it a habit to always come in and knock on my door when I'm in the toilet. This was embarrasing because he would take longer in the toilet when he would be there, plus I also found out that she may be telling strange things to him and complaining about me. The guy himself, super brilliant would jump to the first conclusion and pounce on me. So this was a red flag, that meant no matter what the nature of my conversations would be with her, she would always be filling his ears and he would come after me with the fury of a thousand suns.

I realized that she's an exchange student so she's still adjusting, so I let this one slide, but it also gave me an idea about her character, I realized that this person likes acting like this often and having lived with shitty roommmates before, I decided to keep my distance from her from then on.

Please note we had no real official reason to talk, period. The bills are split with another roommate and I pretty much keep to myself. This would hopefully be the end of it (I would want it to) but sadly it did not end there. Me living my life without getting in their way was not enough for them. They sort of got wind that I was avoiding them.

I dont know why, but she started becoming more aggressive after this. I was making breakfast one day and she started prodding me about my schedule. Normally I dont mind talking about my day to day, but the way she was asking almost suggested that she was trying to extract some sort of negative meaning about it / portray it in a negative way. Well later on I did find out, I dont know if this is because she's an exchange student, but she literally has a lesser load than the other students. Not only that, she does not have classes more often than not and spends most weekends partying and I actually caught her lounging about on campus in a timeslot when she would leave the house usually (not that I care, just that if you are going around trying to gauge how much other people are doing, one would expect that you must be doing something so fruitful to society in the first place because you must be super busy yourself, not if the most important tasks of your day are gossiping and laundry)

I tried not to say much to her because I knew it would only create problems for me and I already had a lot on my hands (engg major).

The lack of attention she was getting made her more spuriously try and do something to get some reaction out of me. My room is outside the kitchen, next to the pantry, so she would stand in front of it and listen in. Not that I care, it's your day you throw away, just that she would play music. I dont care about that either, light music is fine and even good when you cook, doesn't matter to me if you it all day but it's fine. Problem is, this happened right before a major exam, she switched her music from a moderately low to super high.

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The library is pretty noisy, I find my room to be an okay place to study and work from. When they get a hint I'm working on something, they would come in and start playing music very loudly. I literally had to make a video because it was that abysmal.

Now, I dont care if you dont have any coursework or if a few papers is all you ever need to write. I dont give a shit if partying is an everyday occurance for you, I DO NOT give a flying fuck that you dont give two shits about your studies, just please dont try and get in the way of mine.

The first incident sort of introduced the pattern, she wanted people to do the exact same things she was doing or not do it at all.

She's not shitting in the morning? She shit's in the afternoon or does not shit at all and farts around everywhere? EVERYONE in the house must follow it or at least I must do so. She's not studying? NOBODY in the house should study (This one I actually find disgusting, Linda if you're reading this, you're a terrible excuse for a human being and a waste of space, Fuck You).

For the first problem, I found out that the only way to deal with her was to keep distance from whatever shit she would try and start, so I actually waited really late or went really early until everyone was done using the bathroom. It took only a few days for her schedule to break. I went as I pleased from there onwards. She does not know adjustment, so I tried it and it worked, sadly she's taken it as a sign of weakness and intensified her antics (well I believe that this is due to her not having enough to do).

Well for the second one? I dont quite know what to do. Finals are coming up soon and there is quite a load around. My roommate, I dont know how manages parties almost everyday in the house. Look I know you dont have any real courses to worry about, but I do, also what the hell is wrong with you, why not just do something productive or if you have to do all of this, keep it out of the house at least so you dont stop other people from actually doing something worthwhile?

I cant go to the library, everywhere else is too noisy. I have all my books and things in my room. I'm used to working here. Talking to her is not an option, she's rude and impolite. Like hell she would stop anyone from getting her next high.

I lived with Engg majors before and they were pretty busy people, they threw a party but, only at the end of the semester. I mean as a college student, even a senior at that, how do you throw parties almost everyday? I know engineering students who throw parties but they do only on weekends or on holidays. It would be impossible with the amount of work they have to party everyday.

She also lacks common sense, as you know winter has started and people are wearing jackets outside, trying to keep doors and windows closed to keep the cold out. She goes around opening windows because she wants 'fresh air'. Lady, you want fresh air in this weather? Go outside and take a walk, dont open windows. The guy I told you about? Listening to this he would often open the windows of the house. It would be so cold outside that opening the window just a crack would cause the house to become a natural refrigerator. I would go around and close all the windows because it was making me and others (the same guy who would open windows, I think that is why he stopped doing it) sick in the house (if you crack open the window in this weather and leave it open overnight, you're exposed to a bad sort of cold).

This is from the recent parties she threw. These days she has escalated to bringing her friends in and being really loud.

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One grace is that I live on the opposite end of the house from her. She lives on the other side. There is a common area infront of her room with a TV and many sofa's. There's a small dining table set infront of the bathroom (near my end of the room) which she treats as a common area and sits there even though a huge personal common area exists for her on the other side of the house, I dont care but if she's being this disruptive then she should probably be on the other side of the house. This is also close to my room and very bad when she throws parties (also making all of her friends sitting on that table facing the toilet staring at shit). They have comfortable sofa's on the other side of the house, I dont get why that cannot be used.

Apart from this there is literally so much fatty has done, including, talking about me really loudly outside my room, badmouthing me, spreading rumors and even throwing away the sponge I had kept on the sink counter, all of it is unprovoked by me in any way. Hell, I even take phone calls inside my room so that people dont have complaints.

I did not want to write this lenghty post, this piece of shit person deserves a lot less, I have zero idea on how to approach this. I literally had to take videos. There is a limit to stuff. You want to party? Go to a pub.

Nowadays, she is trying to fuck around outside my room. I dont even want to be associated with her, I dont get what is it she wants. This person sucks. Her friends are inconsiderate, if I would go to someone else's house, I would respect their wishes and would not be a burden on them at least. I'm sick and tired of this, her friends are here right now and for a better word still being fucking cunts. I think they're also taking drugs. They're all acting up in weird ways. Fatty Just came in and called the other guy roommate, "Hey X get out of the bathroom, I need to pee!" and then suddenly rushed into the kitchen and I kid you not started stuffing her face with copious amounts of the leftover food she had from her party. I think she was crying at some point.

I've literally not said a word to her. As I said, I've lived with problematic roommates before, so I know that the worst thing you can do to escalate whatever shit they want to do is not engage with them. From all the unprovoked bullshit she's upto, I also think she might be slightly crazy.

Can anyone explain this pattern of behavior or give me some insight? I don't know if this has anything to do with my asian heritage or not, but I apparently heard her calling me by my race rather than my name, it was about who actually uses the kitchen to make food (only me and her, the other guys are jocks so they seldom cook, I cook when I get free), so she said something along the lines of "Only me and the [insert racial slur] guy make food in this house".

On a side note, the bathroom is literally shit, no there is a literal shitstain on the side of the toilet that nobody cleaned up. The guys I live with, however they are, are pretty disciplined, so they would clean their messes. This seems like the handiwork someone who would not only do it and not clean it up, but maybe even try to blame me afterwards. Care to take a guess who it was? Our shower got clogged recently, pretty sure she went around telling everyone I did it. Just that if anyone had noticed in my house, that it was because the shower drain got clogged due to excess hair being stuck in it. How do I know? Because the drain actually overflowed during this period and all the clogged hair came up. It was gross, but the real reason became apparent. I thought the other people in the house would catch on and stop blaming me, but it seems it was not the case. Because that only happens if you have super long hair and shed a lot of it. There's literally only one person like that in the house.

My landlady does not care. So I cannot bring anything to her attention.

EDIT:

Fixed video links, added videos from party held today.

Someone is still sleeping over from the party last night, which means that they'll continue tomorrow. Dont these people have some sort of work to do? Maybe an exam? Or an assignment? How do you party this much?

Submitted November 12, 2017 at 05:54PM by my_roommate_d_fatty http://ift.tt/2mjeL5u Advice

Dealing with crazy roommate Advice

I've lived with other roommates before. This is the worst roommate experience I've ever had.

In a house filled with 11 boys, the landlady decided to bring in a single girl. I dont have any problem with that in itself, just that the many women she did bring to see the house before did not end up taking the house for whatever reason(s). She then started talking to a person who had not seen the house because they were a temporary exchange student who then agreed to take the house ( all this happened solely via email ).

The first few days were enough for things to start unraveling.

I was in the bathroom in the morning and was on my way to start my day, she knocked after a while. I told her I'd be out soon. As soon as I got out she told me in a very stern fashion that if I was to use the bathroom for this long I should be done by 8 AM. Previously, when I had lived with other people, we would have basic human decency to actually let the other person finish and only until it was badly urgent would we go as far as knocking. I cant believe I actually have to mention this, this is common sense. I had not seen this sort of entitlement in my life. I apologised (even though I did not need to ) and told her I had woken up a bit late today (again, I pay equal rent as her so I have zero reason to let someone else decide when I can use a resource in the house as long as it is free and I'm not actually not getting in anyone's way). So she went in and used the bathroom, again, this incident is so stupid I literally am facepalming myself having to mention these details myself, she went in and was done in like 5 mins (that means she did not shower nor shit, so I have no idea why she needed to fight me when I actually had class to go to). She did not have any classes (even though she told me she did in the midst of the talking down she gave me) nor any urgency, so I pondered why the reason for the huge fight?

So a few other guys live with me here on this floor along with her. From the beginning, I had sort of already gotten the idea how things would go if god forbid I actually got into a fight with her and said something back, this was proven true later. After the bathroom incident, one of the guy roommates made it a habit to always come in and knock on my door when I'm in the toilet. This was embarrasing because he would take longer in the toilet when he would be there, plus I also found out that she may be telling strange things to him and complaining about me. The guy himself, super brilliant would jump to the first conclusion and pounce on me. So this was a red flag, that meant no matter what the nature of my conversations would be with her, she would always be filling his ears and he would come after me with the fury of a thousand suns.

I sort of got the idea that this person likes acting like this and having lived with shitty roommmates before, I decided to keep my distance from her from then on.

Please note we had no real official reason to talk, period. The bills are split with another roommate and I pretty much keep to myself. This would hopefully be the end of it (I would want it to) but sadly it did not end there. Me living my life without getting in their way was not enough for them. They sort of got the wind that I was avoiding them.

I dont know why, but she started becoming more aggressive after this. I was making breakfast one day and she started prodding me if I had classes or not. Normally I dont mind talking about my day to day, but the way she was asking almost suggested that she was trying to extract some sort of negative meaning about it. Well later on I did find out, I dont know if this is because she's an exchange student, but she literally has a lesser load than the other students. Not only that, she does not have classes more often than not and spends most weekends partying and I actually caught her lounging about on campus in a timeslot when she would leave the house usually (not that I care, just that if you are going around trying to gauge how much other people are doing, one would expect that you must be doing something so fruitful to society in the first place because you must be super busy yourself, not if the most important tasks of your day are gossiping and laundry)

I tried not to say much to her because I knew it would only create problems for me and I already had a lot on my hands (engg major).

The bathroom is literally shit, no there is a literal shitstain on the side of the toilet that nobody cleaned up. The guys I live with, however they are, are pretty disciplined, so they would clean their messes. This is someone who would do it, maybe even try to blame me afterwards. Our shower got clogged recently, pretty sure she went around telling everyone I did it. Just that if anyone had noticed in my house that the shower drain got clogged due to excess hair being stuck in it. How do I know? Because the drain actually overflowed during this and all the clogged hair came up. It was gross, but the real reason became apparent. I thought the other people in the house would catch on and stop blaming me, but it seems it was not the case. That only happens if you have long hair and shed a lot of it. There's literally only one person like that in the house. My landlady does not care.

The lack of attention she was getting made her more spuriously try and do something to get some reaction out of me. My room is outside the kitchen, next to the pantry, so she would stand in front of it and listen in. Not that I care, it's your day you throw away, just that she would play music. I dont care about that either, light music is fine and even good when you cook, doesn't matter to me if you it all day but it's fine. Problem is, this happened right before a major exam.

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The library is pretty noisy, I find my room to be an okay place to study and work from. When they get a hint I'm working on something, they would come in and start playing music very loudly. I literally had to make a video because it was that abysmal.

Now, I dont care if you dont have any coursework or if a few papers is all you ever need to write. I dont give a shit if partying is an everyday occurance for you, I DO NOT give a flying fuck that you dont give two shits about your studies, just please dont try and get in the way of mine.

The first incident sort of introduced the pattern, she wanted people to do the exact same things she was doing or not do it at all.

She's not shitting in the morning? She shit's in the afternoon or does not shit at all and farts around everywhere? EVERYONE in the house must follow it or at least I must do so. She's not studying? NOBODY in the house should study (This one I actually find disgusting, Linda if you're reading this, you're a terrible excuse for a human being and a waste of space, Fuck You).

For the first problem, I found out that the only way to deal with her was to keep distance from whatever shit she would try and start, so I actually waited really late or went really early until everyone was done using the bathroom. It took only a few days for her schedule to break. I went as I pleased from there onwards. She does not know adjustment, so I tried it and it worked, sadly she's taken it as a sign of weakness and intensified her antics (well I believe that this is due to her not having enough to do).

Well for the second one? I dont quite know what to do. Finals are coming up soon and there is quite a load around. My roommate, I dont know how manages parties almost everyday in the house. Look I know you dont have any real courses to worry about, but I do, also what the hell is wrong with you, why not just do something productive or if you have to do all of this, keep it out of the house at least so you dont stop other people from actually doing something worthwhile?

I cant go to the library, everywhere else is too noisy. I have all my books and things in my room. I'm used to working here. Talking to her is not an option, she's rude and impolite. Like hell she would stop anyone from getting her next high.

I lived with Engg majors before and they were pretty busy people, they threw a party but, only at the end of the semester. I mean as a college student, even a senior at that, how do you throw parties almost everyday? I know engineering students who throw parties but they do only on weekends or on holidays. It would be impossible with the amount of work they have to party everyday.

She also lacks common sense, as you know winter has started and people are wearing jackets outside, trying to keep doors and windows closed to keep the cold out. She goes around opening windows because she wants 'fresh air'. Lady, you want fresh air in this weather? Go outside and take a walk, dont open windows. The guy I told you about? Listening to this he would often open the windows of the house. It would be so cold outside that opening the window just a crack would cause the house to become a natural refrigerator. I would go around and close all the windows because it was making me and others (the same guy who would open windows, I think that is why he stopped doing it) sick in the house (if you crack open the window in this weather and leave it open overnight, you're exposed to a bad sort of cold).

This is from the recent parties she threw. These days she has escalated to bringing her friends in and being really loud.

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One grace is that I live on the opposite end of the house from her. She lives on the other side. There is a common area infront of her room with a TV and many sofa's. There's a small dining table set infront of the bathroom (near my end of the room) which she treats as a common area and sits there even though a huge personal common area exists for her on the other side of the house, I dont care but if she's being this disruptive then she should probably be on the other side of the house. This is also close to my room and very bad when she throws parties (also making all of her friends sitting on that table facing the toilet staring at shit). They have comfortable sofa's on the other side of the house, I dont get why that cannot be used.

Apart from this there is literally so much fatty has done, including, talking about me really loudly outside my room, badmouthing me, spreading rumors and even throwing away the sponge I had kept on the sink counter, all of it is unprovoked by me in any way. Hell, I even take phone calls inside my room so that people dont have complaints.

I did not want to write this lenghty post, this piece of shit person deserves a lot less, I have zero idea on how to approach this. I literally had to take videos. There is a limit to stuff. You want to party? Go to a pub.

Nowadays, she is trying to fuck around outside my room. I dont even want to be associated with her, I dont get what is it she wants. This person sucks. Her friends are inconsiderate, if I would go to someone else's house, I would respect their wishes and would not be a burden on them at least. I'm sick and tired of this, her friends are here right now and for a better word stil being fucking cunts. I think they're also taking drugs. They're all acting up in weird ways. Fatty Just came in and called the other guy roommate, "Hey X get out of the bathroom, I need to pee!" and then suddenly rushed into the kitchen and I kid you not started stuffing her face with copious amounts of the leftover food she had from her party. I think she was crying at some point.

I've literally not said a word to her. As I said, I've lived with problematic roommates before, so I know that the worst thing you can do to escalate whatever shit they want to do is not engage with them. I also think she might be slightly crazy.

Submitted November 12, 2017 at 09:32AM by my_roommate_d_fatty http://ift.tt/2zQYjPF Advice

Read a scary book and can’t stop thinking about it Advice

I read a bit of IT and thought nothing of it until I came to a truly horrific part. The one with the kid and the refrigerator. Now I keep mulling over that part in my mind. I have this terrible thing to where when I freak out about something, I dig up as much info as I can about it. Like a moth to a destructive flame. And i mull it over and over in my head. It’s awful. How do I forget about it?

Submitted September 19, 2017 at 05:54AM by dontcheckmyredditlol http://ift.tt/2xM2yeq Advice

Half the power just went out in my apartment. What do I do? Advice

I flipped my bathroom light on and heard that sound when a light bulb goes out. Nope. It's half my apartment. My refrigerator/freezer was one of the victims. My kitchen light and a random outlet in my main room (studio) are the only things that seem to be working.

Should I contact my landlord or will they get it back on themselves? The lights in the rest of my building seem to be working.

Submitted September 07, 2017 at 04:05AM by Anonymustache_ http://ift.tt/2wHFtIe Advice

Dodgy leftovers, might be a month old. Am I going to get sick? Advice

My mom made pork chops baked with cheese and tomatoes for me a few weeks ago. I packed it up after it cooled down to room temperature and brought it to work. Forgot about it in the work refrigerator for a few weeks...I found it today and ate the pork chops (why? idk. it smelled fine, tasted fine.) Am I going to get sick? Now that I think about it, I feel like an idiot. What's the oldest food you've ever eaten? Did you get sick? Is there something I can eat now to make my stomach acid stronger so I don't get sick?

Submitted August 10, 2017 at 12:48AM by sturaberry http://ift.tt/2uHQtB6 Advice

I am a college student moving into a condo and need legal advice Advice

As the title says, I'll be moving into a condominium beside my college. The thing is however, is that I haven't actually signed the contract yet due to some fears I have regarding potential situations. Note that this is the first time I'm dealing with this sort of thing so I have no idea what I'm doing at all.

The Condo is outfitted with an air-conditioning unit and a Refrigerator. I'm unsure of their usage history and current condition but it's clear that they've been used by previous tenants.

One thing I'm worried about with the contract is that it doesn't actually outline that damage to the property done by malfunction not caused by me with these two appliances will be shouldered by the landlord.

He only specified that damages done to the appliances and leased premise arising from anything, including wear and tear, will be paid for by the tenant out of the security deposit.

So to conclude this post... I'm worried that on this contract, there seems to be no guarantee from the landlord that he will cover any repairs to the property arising from any situation regardless if I am involved in the cause of damage or not.

How should I handle this?

Submitted July 23, 2017 at 03:23PM by Argon-Haunt http://ift.tt/2uNbpdB Advice

How to sleep in a very hot place without ventilation? Advice

Hello, I am staying in a place for the night and there is no ventilation and it's 46°C here and I can't find another place. It has a Tv, a bed and a table, and there is no refrigerator in the house. Any advice to help me sleep tonight? Help, I don't have money to stay anywhere else.

Submitted July 13, 2017 at 11:12PM by agamemnonides http://ift.tt/2uVQdzR Advice

How to sleep in a very hot place without ventilation? Advice

Hello, I am staying in a place for the night and there is no ventilation and it's 46°C here and I can't find another place. It has a Tv, a bed and a table, and there is no refrigerator in the house. Any advice to help me sleep tonight? Help, I don't have money to stay anywhere else.

Submitted July 13, 2017 at 11:12PM by agamemnonides http://ift.tt/2uVQdzR Advice

What foods go in which refrigerator drawers? Advice

I have two drawers in my fridge with no controls on them. One says "Fresh" and the other says "Crisper." I know that certain foods go in each one because of the differing humidity levels and such, but I can't for the life of me figure out which is which.

I know fruits and things that tend to rot go in one, while things that tend to wilt instead of rot, such as lettuce, go in another.

Which is which?

EDIT: There IS a humidity control for the "fresh drawer."

Submitted July 06, 2017 at 08:17PM by cautiouswhitegirl http://ift.tt/2uOyIjU Advice

My roommate doesn't contrinute food, cleaning, or weed. What do I do? Advice

So my room mate "Frank" has been in a tight financial spot for a few months & hasn't been able to contribute to the refrigerator stock, but also isn't washing dishes, helping around the house anymore, & stays paying his part of the hills 1-3 weeks late. I cook at home 3 times a week, he takes leftovers to work for lunch, eats everything in the house that I buy, and when he does get some extra money he goes to the drive thru for himself instead of getting groceries. He also isn't throwing down at all for the weed fund and has no issue sparking my shit. Where do I start with him? He's historically been a decent roommate with cleaning but for the past few months his housekeeping has gone to total shit. To the point when I was cleaning two weeks ago he sat on his ass and watched movies all day and said "I'll get the dishes later". Nigga we got fruit flies get the fuck up. I understand what it's like to be extremely financially strapped, but I also understand when I was in those situations I made sure to make up for it in other ways. I'm not expecting a maid but I don't think I should be cooking and cleaning every day for another grown ass man. Idk what to do short of chin checking him.

Submitted May 31, 2017 at 06:19AM by stayblacc http://ift.tt/2qxKq51 Advice

What are some gifts that are either practical or not generic but are appropriate for most adults? Advice

I make an amazon list of gifts throughout the year so I'll have plenty of ideas when it comes time to buy small inexpensive gifts for coworkers and various acquaintances that I don't know very personally. Tide to go stain removal pens, multifunction pocket tools, first aid kits, nice soap or hand creams, mini table tennis kits, novelty playing cards, plant growing kits, stationary, alphabet refrigerator magnets, back scratchers, kinetic sand, those odor eliminator stainless steel soap bars, emergency lanterns, ocean wave projector night lights, huge packs of sharpies, back scratchers, batteries etc.

I use this list for a lot of people, I'm looking for ideas so I can expand the list. Are there any items you would suggest? Maybe a kitchen gadget or a book anyone would appreciate?

Submitted May 29, 2017 at 12:55AM by stankpoon http://ift.tt/2qsLbYJ Advice

How do you talk with a roommate about messiness? Advice

I'm a 26-year-old professional living in a 2 bedroom / 1 bathroom duplex with one other male about my age, who happens to be a friend of mine from years back. I've been living in this duplex for going on 2 years now, and he moved in about 9 months ago when my old roommate moved away. While we certainly aren't super close, we get along well and have no problems being in the same room or hanging out.

I by no means am a clean freak and most people would probably consider my room messy, however, I live by the idea that when living with other people, common areas should be tidy-ish. To me, that means few dishes left in the sink, no moldy leftovers in the refrigerator, and a relatively clean bathroom. I don't expect that dishes be washed as soon as they're dirty, that the toilet bowl be sparkling clean, or set any kind of cleaning schedules. We're adults with lives of our own, I'm not his keeper and he's not mine. I do my part, and I expect my roommates to do the same.

So here's the problem: my current roommate does not live with these same ideas. He doesn't do dishes with any sort of frequency (though certainly makes his share of dishes), has never once cleaned the bathroom, doesn't take out the trash, and doesn't clean out his leftovers from the fridge. I understand that not everyone has the same priorities with regards to cleaning, so have just let it go.

As a result of recent events, I now spend more time at my house (was previously out of town nearly every weekend for work), and now the state of my house is starting to affect my mood. I dread coming home because I know it's going to be a mess; I hate cooking because there isn't room in the sink to clean up my dishes or the dishes I need are already in the sink covered in grime and old food; I don't want to bring friends or my girlfriend over because my house is embarrassingly dirty.

I've opened dialogues over having cleaning days that were met with "yeah, totally" and then when the time comes I'm the only one cleaning. I've gone out of my way to recognize him when he does clean, thanking him and showing genuine appreciation. None of it translated into any kind of regular cleaning, and now I've resorted to just passive-aggressively only cleaning the dishes I make and leaving his messes to him. But this has only backfired, as he doesn't seem to notice or care, and the only person it seems to affect in the end is me. It's been two weeks of me not cleaning up after him, he's had two 3-day weekends to clean up the messes that he has left in the house, yet he made no attempt or mention of the messes and instead cloistered himself in his room.

I know that I'm not the only one who's gone through this, and I'm sure that many of you have advice on how to rectify the situation in a positive way. So, how do I constructively and respectfully bring up that the current state of the house is negatively affecting me and that I'm doing everything I can and need him to take responsibility and help out?

Submitted May 19, 2017 at 10:52AM by puggington http://ift.tt/2pRpOnO Advice

I had to break into my house because my mom kicked me out? Advice

I had to do this twice. (And yesterday I got kicked out of a car and tried to walk home, but that's a different story). So I just got back from school, and the first thing that happens is that I get into a fight with my parents. This happens every day, because I don't like my parents and cannot tolerate them, and they don't like me and can't tolerate me. My mom and sister stay in the card (dad is at work), and I try to get inside the house. Door's locked, so I jump over the fence and go through the back door to get inside. That's fine. They don't really look for me and just go inside (this was the first time I really went into my house through the back door or anything, but I didn't care that they weren't concerned).

Then, about 15 minutes later, I went to grab a bottled water from the refrigerator in the garage (my mom didn't let me go near the fridge that was inside), and when I came back, the door was locked. Thinking that I might have forgotten to unlock it, I knocked on the door, and I heard my mom telling my sister "not to open it". I jumped back over the fence, and tried the front door again. Then, I remembered that there was a spare key to get inside the house, so I quickly got that one out and unlocked the door. They didn't acknowledge my presence, and I went to my room to browse reddit. But what should I do next? I really don't know what would happen if they lock me out again and there is no spare key, or if the back door is locked. I need a backup plan of some sort or some way to get out of this situation. Any help?

Submitted May 11, 2017 at 07:23AM by comphacker http://ift.tt/2plZkKU Advice

In serious need of advice and tips on cleaning my entire house. Advice

Hi there. So I'm not sure where else to post but I REALLY need to clean my ENTIRE house. I just finished college and it's been getting very dirty the last few weeks as I was cramming to wrap up my school work. Any and all tips and advice or resources appreciated!

I struggle a lot with motivation and am essentially just so overwhelmed with this project that I don't know where to start. I live in a 2 bedroom upper flat (with a roommate who keeps to herself - part of why I want to clean up everything to be respectful). The main rooms are the kitchen, my room, the bathroom, and the living room. EVERYTHING needs to be done - dishes, laundry, vacuuming, cat litter boxes, even down to cleaning the refrigerator.

Any clean-freaks out there have tips for me to start this project? I have the whole day off tomorrow and am hoping to get as much done as possible. I just don't know where to start!

Submitted May 09, 2017 at 05:46AM by out__of_gas http://ift.tt/2q0eX7K Advice