Monday, November 30, 2015

Advice on living situation Advice

Hi all, I need advice on my current living situation. I am a graduate student and my aunt generously allowed me to live with her rent free while I'm in school. I've been living with her a little over a year now, but it hasn't been the most enjoyable experience for me. First off, I am thankful she has been so kind to allow me to occupy a space in her home for free, so this situation really eats away at me because I feel guilty feeling this way. I just don't have much privacy in her home. She constantly goes to my room and goes through my things, takes some of my things when I'm not here; it's as if she has a free pass to do so as long as I'm gone. I've expressed to her how this bothers me in the past and at first she became defensive, not being honest that she does this. She likes to rearrange things and clean things a lot, so that's what she would do in my room, but in the process would go through my things and for some reason, this really irritates me--it's one of my biggest pet peeves. I guess it makes me feel like I don't have control over my own space. She has stopped doing this openly as much since we had that argument, but she still does it and does it more sneakily, which even irritates me more. I think because our relationship has always been an open one, that we have always been pals without any boundaries, she can't see that boundaries need to exist when you live with someone. Also we share the refrigerator, and whenever I leave something over the weekend, especially if I'm gone for the weekend, she'll eat it without asking me, or even more annoyingly, will basically eat or drink the whole thing but still put the carton/container back in the refrigerator. It drives me nuts and I've also brought this up but she gets offended and isn't honest with me or changes the subject; she may stop doing this for a while but then start again if I don't say anything. I have stopped confronting her, because I don't want to ruin our relationship, and have realized I can't change her behavior. It's not like it's any roommate, in which case I would have no problem confronting her. Haha I guess this is a form of payment for rent...I do realize that she is being very generous letting me stay here for free, and there's no point in finding another place since I only have a few more months left before school is over. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks



Submitted November 30, 2015 at 02:36PM by marbella516 http://ift.tt/1IuqiOX Advice

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