I've decided that I am officially giving up. I decided this after coming home from college. I attend a top university and I'm surrounded by people from all sorts of backgrounds, but I'm sure I come from one of the worst.
I come home, there's hardly any food in the refrigerator, I have a broken phone that I can't even afford to replace, I need new shoes, and I know that when I go back to my dorm my roommates and hallmates will all have nice new things on top of all the things they needed. I'll have to break it to my engineering group partners that I still don't have a new phone (which they sneer at, because apparently they're too good to communicate via facebook or email) and I'll still walk with shoes that leak water into them. My family is suffering financially and they tell me not to make it my problem but it's becoming my problem. And I'm so busy with school, but I know I'd have to get a job to buy the things I need, and my roommates ask me why I'd ever work when I'm taking 18 credits, but unlike them, I'd have to.
I read articles every day saying that upward mobility is dead and that poor kids become poor adults. There's no point in trying in this day and age. I'll never make it out of this cycle. So instead of succumbing to life, I'm succumbing to myself.
And there's no point in telling me to call the suicide hotlines, because I don't have a phone to do so.
Goodbye.
Submitted November 27, 2015 at 11:07PM by mrednelwme http://ift.tt/1IeFEfE SuicideWatch
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