Not so much how, as how can I live with myself.
TLDR: My family live like pigs. Boxes of stuff they won't throw away piled to the roof, trash on the floor everywhere, only small walking areas. Rotten food everywhere in the kitchen. I'm the only one paying for everything. If I leave they will likely be homeless. What can I do without being a dick? If I give them an ultimatum to clean the shit up, they likely wont...
I moved away from my family to get a good office job finally, where I can finally move somewhere in the career field I want to. And I did it partially because my family lived in disgusting conditions, and they had a lot of hold over me on a lot of things that I needed to break, by living on my own. This was the first time really that I did it, successfully for a long period of time.
A year and a half later I was homesick, and my job would allow me to work remotely. So I moved back home 2 states away from where I was. I was happy I moved back to my home state, still am, even though it's super southern and this town is stupid. But I was happy to be back home to what I was familiar with, however, my mistake was moving back in with my family.
I live with my brother, sister and mother. My brother has disability and a few foodstamps (He's obese, like 600+ pounds which is how he has disability), my sister has foodstamps but no disability even though she's trying. Unlike my brother she's truly disabled, her ankle is so bad she has to use crutches whenever she goes anywhere, and she can't move much anyway.
My mother actually works, she works in home health care taking care of elderly people. But she's getting pretty old, she's also obese, and the job is hard on her, especially since my short plump mother has to sometimes carry full grown men from a wheelchair to their bed.
But she doesn't make much money, she doesn't actually pay any household bills, just her car insurance and a title loan that is sucking her dry.
I work a good salaried job where I pretty much make my own hours. I've got it pretty good, and I pay all but $300 of the bills, my brother contributes $300 of his disability to the bills. This isn't so bad, in fact I save a bit of money by living with them.
But there are some huge problems here. My mom hoards stuff, and my sister hoards trash. Our living room, kitchen, dining room and my mother / sisters bedroom are full of boxes and trash. They have boxes piled to the roof and trash everywhere but in small walk ways.
On top of this, my mom likes to hoard food. If she can get food for free, no matter what it is, she will bring it home. Except it's food we can't eat fast enough or plain don't want. So we have rotting potatoes by the door, a rotting pumpkin and watermelon on the front porch, rotting peaches on a table in the dining room, and something somewhere rotting in the kitchen. I don't know what it is, or where it is, but it stinks.
The refrigerator is full of rotten expired food they never clean out.
The entire house smells and is full of trash and boxes of shit they never use.
I would be okay with the situation we have now, IF they kept things vaguely clean and organized. Which means throwing what they don;t use out and not letting shit rot everywhere or leaving stuffed caked to counters and shit.
None of them clean, or do anything. my mom gets home and is exhausted so she reads then sleeps. My sister sleeps constantly and my brother sits around all day playing games, despite him being the oldest, he's still basically a child because he does nothing but plays games and shirks all responsibility. He hasn't held a job in 10 years.
So not only am I (the youngest in the family) working to support my entire family, they don't do anything with their free time. No cleaning, nothing.
Now, I have a very tiny room. it's the smallest room in this shitty rundown rented house. It's barely large enough for my computer desk and bed. I work, and I sleep. The only thing I use in the rest of the house is the fridge, where I keep drinks. Most of what I eat is microwaveable or ready to eat. So the entire house being a fucking mess is about 0.01% my fault, and thats only because I sometimes use the kitchen trashcan. (I have my own trashcan where I dispose of most everything.)
My problem is, if I were to leave and live on my own, my family couldn't support themselves because they refuse to do anything. They would likely become homeless or live off of friends. MAYBE if they tried hard enough they might get section 8 housing, but they'd likely get kicked out because the house is a shitty mess.
Should I leave them? I know I'd feel like a complete asshole, but I don't know what else to do. I can give them an ultimatum, clean this shit up, or I leave. But I'm still an asshole, and I'm fairly sure they wouldn't clean anything up, and things would get really hostile.
At this point, I don't know what to do. I want to live on my own, but honestly I'm okay with being here, IF they clean it up, so I can go out in the living room and maybe watch some tv with myf amily or something. As it is now, there is no room for anything...
Submitted November 09, 2015 at 05:45AM by Waizujin http://ift.tt/1MtwZ98 Advice
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