Friday, September 23, 2016

My grandmother [72F] keeps sending my wife [23F] and I [24M] home decor that we don't need. Are we in the wrong if we try to sell it for money that we do need? relationships

Hi Reddit. I'm proheath, a 24 year old dude from Texas. Been on Reddit for a while, but I don't think I've ever shown my face on /r/relationships before.

Preface This first bit is not what I'm seeking help with; it is only here to provide you all with an idea of where I am coming from.

I lost my job last Friday. My wife and I were damn near broke before this happened, but without being able to count on being able to earn a wage, our finances are looking increasingly shitty.

I'm a type 1 diabetic, and my supply of insulin was due to run out Thursday afternoon. Normally, that's not a serious issue. I live literally next door to my pharmacy, so I simply hop on over and refill. We had just enough funds to cover the regular copay, However, my insurance has "reset" since I last filled a script, so I was then responsible for covering the annual deductible before insurance covers anything. I was about $200 short.

I went back home, discussed it with my wife, and we decided to just overdraw our account to pay for the meds. Insulin is definitely not something I can go without for any amount of time. Period.

Again, not normally such a big deal. She and I both get paid (at least we used to) every other Friday, so we expected a decent sum to hit our account the following morning and bring our balance back up to positive. Sure, overdraft fees suck, but that fee is nowhere near as bad as going all night without insulin, not to mention the cost of the resulting hospital visit.

Unfortunately, that's not how it went down. My final paycheck wasn't direct deposited, and my former employer didn't have it either. I have to go to the corporate office on Monday and jump through hoop after hoop to receive my check. My wife is a full time student, and only works part time, so her check barely covered the amount needed to bring us up to a positive balance.

My Wife and I I love my wife to pieces. We got married in June of this year, and have been together since February of last year. As I mentioned earlier, my wife is a full time student. She's studying Environmental Geoscience at a large state university, and works part time as a cashier at a tool store. She even holds a sales record or two for warranties and other upsells at her location. She's awesome, I tell ya!

Also, nobody in either of our families knows we're married. The circumstances really aren't that weird, I promise. It's just how my wife and I decided to handle our marriage. Our closest friends, as well as all of our newer local friends are the only ones who know. Maybe one day I can better explain our situation in another post.

My Memaw Pronounced Mee-maw. If you're not still calling your grandparents what you called them when you were a child, you're doing it wrong.

Memaw married into money after my grandfather died. I never met him, but he seemed chill. Her new husband, my Pawpaw, owns a some oil producing land and several restaurants in West Texas. I don't know what the man's portfolio really looks like, but it's obvious he's got money.

Memaw and Pawpaw are almost secretive about their wealth. It's as if they try to pretend they aren't well off in the hopes that the rest of the family doesn't notice. I don't blame them. That side of my family consists of degenerates, my father included. If allowed, I don't doubt that Memaw and Pawpaw's wealth would be sucked dry by these leeches.

Because of this secrecy, it has always been a big no no to ever ask Memaw for money for any reason.

Memaw has literally told me that I'm her favorite grandchild because I'm the only one who hasn't asked for money.

Now don't get me wrong, Memaw isn't selfish. She gives and gives and gives to me at random times. Birthdays weren't ever a big deal to her though -- some weird religion thing.

The Apartment After what seemed like forever, we finally got our own apartment. No roommates, except for Bubbles, our kitty. I moved in with her in her college apartment last year while we waited out her lease so that we could finally get our own place. Her college apartment was fully furnished -- the new apartment was not.

When we moved in, we had essentially nothing but clothes, an entertainment center, tv, curtains, dinnerware, and bedding. My wife's family hooked it up with some couches and a dining table, and my family somehow managed to get us a bed a little after we moved in. The apartment came with a stove and refrigerator, no other appliances.

Memaw to the Rescue I talk to Memaw maybe once every couple of weeks. It seems to always be small talk, on facebook weirdly. She didn't know we had moved until she saw my wife talk about it on social media. She asked for pictures, to which I obliged.

Shortly after, she sends me a screen shot of a receipt for a bunch of furniture and housewares. It's clearly being sent to me. She got us side tables, lamps, mirrors, and a dresser for the bedroom, as well as some decorations for the living room, and a huge matching set of dinnerware and a microwave. I thanked her endlessly right then, as well as when they arrived. I sent pics to her of all the stuff put together and in use, and thought that was that.

A couple days ago, a couple more packages started coming. Throw pillows. Cool. I love pillows! We already have pillows, but who's complaining about MORE comfort? We've received 6 separate deliveries of assorted pillows and a blanket in the past 3 days. We are now in possession of a dozen pillows that I'm not sure we even have room for, let alone a need for.

The Moral Dilemma The struggle is gettin' real in the proheath household. Job hunting isn't going as well as I had hoped. I'm being reintroduced to what I truly feel is poverty life, a life I hoped to not live again. I'm legitimately concerned with being able to put food on our table. I am running out of options. I'm looking at all these matching pillows and all I see is an easy sell for some quick cash on a local facebook for sale page. Asking Memaw for permission to sell the gifts she got me is not an option.

I'm struggling internally on whether or not I'm an asshole for even considering it. If I sold them and she ever found out, it would likely change our relationship forever.

tl;dr: Wife and I are broke and searching for sources of quick cash. Grandmother sent us lots of matching pillows that I don't need or have room for, and could likely sell easily online, but would take serious offense if she ever finds out. What do?



Submitted September 24, 2016 at 09:50AM by proheath http://ift.tt/2dc6Imf relationships

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