Hey legal advice! I come to you from Massachusetts with a tale of prolonged abuses sustained at the hands of my utterly incompetent and presumably sadistic landlord. From the day my roommates and I moved in, she has repeatedly neglected to fulfil her duties as outlined by our state's housing code. Among a multitude of other offenses, she has:
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Failed to address an ongoing rodent infestation, instead sending exterminators to the wrong floor and placing blame on us for "keeping food on the ground" (we typically utilize cabinets and the refrigerator for food storage, as we are not barbarians)
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Failed to provide a receipt with details of the escrow account where our security deposits - should - have been safely accruing interest (relevant later)
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Failed to respond to numerous maintenance/habitability issues (including faulty wiring and transparent glass bedroom doors that one roommate had to live with). Her preferred course of action in these matters was to cease contact, speed away quickly when caught in our driveway after ignoring us, or - best of all - claim that we were causing her mental duress that she found incompatible with her upcoming tropical vacation.
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Repeatedly announced her presence by violently kicking the door and shouting "LANDLORD, LANDLORD", thus awakening my roommates and I from peaceful and much-needed slumber. Her voice was so shrill that it induced a permanent and ever-present ringing that serves as constant reminder of the torment we underwent.
Further, her name appears nowhere on the lease (her husband owns the company through which we rented the apartment; he courteously endowed her the responsibility of being our landlord, presumably in the hopes of securing the occasional moment of peace for himself). Her above legal violations are enough to mandate a complete reimbursement of our security deposits according to our state housing code, even if the apartment had sustained damage.
On to her most recent act of diplomacy - absent any approval from my roommates and I, she permitted the incoming lessees to inundate our apartment with truckloads of crap (most of it gaudy and tasteless), thereby blocking corridors and entranceways. Rubbing salt into our already tender wounds, she later slapped us with a $500 "cleaning fee" (the cheapest she could find for our expansive 800 sq.ft. apartment). From the pictures she sent as justification, it seems that this medical-grade sterilization came as a response to several stray pubic hairs residing beneath our toilet seat.
The real kicker - after blockading our apartment with crates of horse shit, the incoming lessees proceeded to barge in prior to our move-out time, demanding that we vacate immediately so that they could stay the night. After my subletter kindly recommended their fucking off as an alternative, the girls left in a huff and we assumed that the matter had been settled. Naturally, our landlord felt obliged to deliver a final blow to our fractured spirits, writing us in a fury to command payment of an Uber charge incurred by the lessees, who claimed that our refusal to vacate produced severe distress.
Basically, the situation is as follows: the cleaning fee she plans to deduct from our security deposits is minimal and by no means grounds for a suit, despite the fact that we are legally entitled to full reimbursement. If it were any other landlord, I would even be fine forgetting about her numerous failures and moving on. However, this particular human-shaped bundle of putridity has maintained such an insufferable air of arrogance through our correspondence that I feel it is my debt to the universe to ensure retribution.
As I have been subletting and am therefore remote and unable to flood the vents with cockroaches, I seek to deliver vengeance through alternative means. It is with this noble quest that I come to you today - help me help humanity by ensuring this evil incarnate is never able to inflict such profound suffering upon any lessee ever again.
I pray that together we shall prevail. I look forward to reading your advice.
Submitted September 07, 2016 at 07:38AM by tribecous http://ift.tt/2ceR5Kw legaladvice
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