Hey all, I hope it's okay to use a throwaway here, also kind of a long story so bear with me.
Background info: I'm 22 (male) and have had two serious relationships in the past (both 2+ years). I fell into both of my relationships and lucked out that I liked both of the people, because of that though I don't have much experience when it comes to dating/flirting.
Work Info: I’ve been working at my company for 2 years now, it’s a laid back company that has 300 or so employees. When I say laid back I mean we have refrigerators with beer and you will often find departments going out at lunch to drink and hangout. Along with that a bunch of departments don’t follow the strict hierarchy rules you find with traditional companies, neither of my two supervisors really act like bosses since we all have different responsibilities, we really act as equals. All that aside we’re a successful company that’s always growing (swear this will make sense soon).
Her (26): Midyear last year my old supervisor quit randomly and we needed to fill his shoes quickly, after interviewing a bunch of people she came in and the rest of my team and I immediately knew she’d be a great fit. -- She is one of the smartest, most interesting, and professional people I’ve ever met. She knows her field very well and isn’t afraid to question bad decisions no matter how high up the company ladder it is coming from. Fast Forward 7 months and she indeed was the perfect fit. She’s helped rearrange our entire department for the better and takes on way more than I thought possible. We hang out all day at work (in our department conference room) and sometimes grab drinks after work, we get lunch together almost every day as well. I had a big group of friends at work that I introduced her to and she fits in perfectly.
Now my dilemma: I’ve had a thing for her since the minute I met her. Not knowing how to flirt I quickly got close to her the way you’d get close with a friend. I know we’re very good friends at this point and I keep trying to slyly ask her out on dates, the only issue is I don’t want to straight ask her and potentially screw my work situation up. If she took it the wrong way not only would I lose a friend I may fuck up the beginning of my career. I’ve tried to ask her out twice already but I know damn well that both could have been interpreted as hanging out. My most recent attempt was two weekends ago, I texted her asking if she’d want to get dinner and catch a movie with me, ending it with “Just us”. I figured that would be clear enough but her response was that she couldn’t that night.
I catch her looking/smiling at me almost everyday and she always seems excited when I get to work so she can share with me what she did in her evenings and on her weekends.
In the end, I think of her more than anyone and I’m just happy to have her in my life.
Long rant done; I’ll end with a few questions.
Is it realistic to expect an honest, “I’m not interested, sorry.” answer from a friend/coworker? Should I risk it and ask her straight up? Are these things that are normal for friends and I’m overthinking it? Could our age difference be an issue and I’m not noticing it?
(I should also say she’s one of my first close female friends).
If you need any more info please let me know, and thanks for taking the time to read this even if you don’t have an answer or opinion!
tl;dr: I think I'm in love with my supervisor/friend and I'm not sure what to do.
Submitted March 19, 2017 at 01:07PM by Is_This_It_For_Me http://ift.tt/2nnn1AT relationships
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