For just about as long as I've been able to formulate a meaningful response to the human voice, my Nmom has spent every moment taking every minor inconvenience or malfunction that could happen in her daily life, and using it to try and get me to see my dad as the villain.
Any time the washing machine clogged and overflowed, Nmom made SURE to go on for HOURS to me privately about how it happened because she can't ask my dad to fix it for her, because he'll just get mad at her.
Any time she's gotten a flat tire, she's HAD to reiterate to me in many, many ways that it happened because she has to FIGHT to get help from my dad to air it up or take it to get changed, and NO she won't just ask him.
Any time the refrigerator has stopped cooling the food and all it needs is a new coil, NO she won't call the spectacular maytag repairman to come fix it because she doesn't want to create a bill for dad, he'll get mad and she would NEVER do that to anyone.
I've missed out on having a meaningful bond with my father because she had to play him up as the bad guy in these little ways over the years. I'm mentally fucked because of the way she has gone on and on and on about how much of a villain dad is, but no don't ever talk to him to his face because that'll immediately ruin the facade. She's choked me, slapped me, screamed directly into my ears because I was actually going to take the proactive approach and do the things that'd solve the problem she's complaining about being my dad's fault.
Her response when I tell her she can JUST ask my dad, call a repairman, a professional, someone, anyone who can actually fix her problems so she doesn't have to complain about how my dad is at fault?
"I'm sorry, I know you just want me to shut up forever that's it. I'm not supposed to talk anymore."
Infuriating. 20 years of this.
Submitted March 21, 2017 at 11:30AM by Alpine_Hell http://ift.tt/2nZ24st raisedbynarcissists
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