[Rant] I'm not motivated, I'm pissed. keto

I fail every single day.

I'm not unhappy with my failures because I've grown so much through them. I've failed Keto twice. Not because it didn't work but because I lost sight of the "why".

Why I'm restricting my diet to keto-friendly foods; why I'm passing McDonalds when all I want to do is hit that drive-through for a McDouble; why I pass the treats at work during Birthdays and special events; why my friends give me the silent "this keto-thing won't work but I won't say anything to him" treatment when I go out to eat with them. Losing the "why" is why I failed.

I'm starting again, because when I'm on Keto, I have energy and drive, and a self-filling well of motivation but most importantly- I have control over my life. That control is the thing that keeps me going, keeps me addicted to this lifestyle. When you can get to that mental place of peace in your mind that so many of you keto-ites get to, that beautiful black and white decision in your mind when confronted with a treat, where you can look and immediately say "yes" or "no" to eating it. That control, makes life a little more tolerable, a little more simpler.

So, I have my pantry stocked with almond and coconut flour and I remember the awesome recipes I learned that last two times I've done this. I'm going to the grocery store tonight and getting the rest of the refrigerator goods.

I'm a 24 year old male who weighs about 280-290. It may not seem like a lot to all the awesome men and women who have overcome so much larger odds (whom I have amazing respect for), but it's my challenge, every day. It's a challenge to look in the mirror anymore. Whenever a see a reflection of myself, it ruins my day (sometimes my week).

I'm not motivated, I'm pissed.

I'm tired of this weak little man inside of me that holds on to the short-term pleasures and ends up holding me back from achieving my goals.

I need this community, now more than ever. My goal in 220 lbs. That's a loss of about 60-70 lbs that I want to achieve in the next 10 months. I'll be on this sub-reddit every night until then to soak up all our your victories that will spur me on the the finish line.

Thank you to all of you, you inspire me.

Submitted October 29, 2014 at 10:47PM by dynamic-bacon http://ift.tt/1tiRo61 keto