This is the first chapter of my romance story. It's basically one of the two chapters I'm using to present important backstory and then the romance story starts 10 years later. I would love some criticism because I feel as though my writing is not up to par. I used to be much better at writing, but I haven't written in about a year. I'm very discouraged right now, but I'm trying to keep going. I would love suggestions.
August 2004
“Hey, it’s Christopher. I can’t pick up the phone right now. So, uh, if you’ve got something important to say, you know what to do.” Beep.
I pushed my finger against the end call button and kept it tightly held there in frustration as I closed my eyes. I tried to think up reasons not to scream right in Christopher’s face, but the only decent reason I came up with was that I’d look crazy to bystanders. After not answering the three calls that I’d placed in six hours, I felt that I had every right to scream at Christopher. After all, he was the one that had gotten me into this mess. Or at least he helped.
“Are you gonna buy anything?”
I turned around a little startled that someone had been watching me. It was an employee at the gas station I was perusing. I’d been in there for fifteen minutes. During that time I had paced back and forth in one aisle eyeing the merchandise with my left hand pressed against my back and my right hand playing with my lower lip. When I became too flustered with the choices, I would do the same thing by the refrigerator with the beverages. I probably looked crazy. I mean, when people go into a gas station they typically don’t spend a lot of time. They either get exactly what they went in there for or they grab everything that catches their eye. Either way, it takes less than five minutes.
“Uh, yeah,” I coughed. “Do you have any suggestions for –“
“They’re all the same.” She either read my mind or knew all the aisles by heart, therefore knowing that I was in the section with pregnancy tests, lubricants, and condoms. I blushed knowing it was probably the latter.
“Oh,” I mumbled. I reached out my hand and grabbed the first pregnancy test that my fingers grazed upon. I took it up to the counter and purchased it without making eye contact with the employee.
Before I could even make it out the door, the gas station employee said one more thing to me that made my cheeks turn two darker shades of red. “There’s a bathroom in the back.”
“Thanks,” I shuffled toward the back of the gas station to let a plastic stick tell me my future.
I removed the pregnancy test from the packaging set it on the toilet paper dispenser before I pulled my pants down. I sat on the toilet for five minutes praying to the pee fairy to let me urinate so the lady at the cash register wouldn’t have to think I was any more crazy than she already thought. Finally, my prayers were answered. I quickly picked up the pee-stick with my jittery fingers and inserted it under the yellow stream of truth. I sat it back on the toilet dispenser and called Christopher a sixth time, hoping he would finally answer and soothe me while I wait for the pee-stick to tell me if I’m going to be a mommy.
“Hey, it’s Christopher. I can’t –“
“You can’t get your dick out of Justin’s ass long enough to answer a damn phone call is what you can’t do,” I grunted as I hung up.
I sighed and picked up the pregnancy test after what seemed like an eternity. I gripped it tightly in my hand but failed to actually allow myself to look at the one (or two) pink lines. I sighed as I shoved it into my purse and stormed out of the bathroom.
“Bad news?” the snarky employee asked.
“Shutup, potato head.”
I drove around for about half an hour before I finally decided to take the route back home. I pulled into the driveway and waved to Jason who had waved to me first. He was outside with Christopher and a few of their other old high school friends playing drunk basketball. I put my car in park and finally decided to muster up enough balls to look at the results of my pee-stick.
Positive. Pregnant. Great.
I wanted to cry, but I had to tell Christopher before I could do that. I had to know how he would react first. I figured that if he was going to react in a harsh and insensitive way it would be best to cry all at once about my ruined future and my ended relationship than to cry on two different occasions.
I held my breath as I tried to hold back the tears. As I tried not to think about what my family would say. As I tried not to think about what my professors at university would think. Finally, I stepped out of the car. Christopher seemed to notice and jogged over next to me.
“Jessie, I have great news. I was going to wait until move-in day to surprise you, but –“
“Christopher, can I please talk first. I have something very important to tell you,” I said, looking at his sneakers.
“Babe, me first, please,” he paused with a huge smile plastered across his face. I tried to stretch the corners of my mouth enough to resemble a real smile. “I transferred schools so we’ll be together next year. No more Skype. So, I was thinking that we could –“
“Okay, but I don’t think that –“
“What, you’re not excited? I thought you’d be happy. I thought…” he trailed off and his face fell.
“No, Christopher. That’s great news,” I smiled. “I’m gonna go inside. I’m tired.” I sighed as he walked away. I slumped on into my house. I couldn’t tell him. I just couldn’t. He looked so happy about the news and so sad when he thought that I wasn’t happy. He was trying to be sweet and thoughtful, but he was also drunk at 3pm on a Tuesday afternoon. He wasn’t exactly dad material. Not yet at 19 anyway.
My mind raced as I pounded one foot after the other up the stairs to my bedroom. It continued to race even more as I plopped down face first onto my bed. I started thinking about the small town gossip and what Christopher would do. I started to think about how I could ever manage getting a job, taking care of a baby, and moving out of my parent’s house. My heart pounded in my chest as I tried to hold back the tears that were stinging my eyes, but it was no use. They started streaming down my hot cheeks, around my lips, and down my chin while I sat there with my mouth open; paralyzed.
Hours passed, but I stayed in a ball in my bed until my mom decided to check up on me.
She sat on my bed. “What’s going on sweetheart?”
I rubbed the palm of my hands over my entire face and heaved a sigh. I told her everything about how I missed my period. About the snarky employee at the gas station. How Christopher didn’t know yet. About all my worries.
“This is something that can be figured out,” she tried smiling.
I smiled back, but had to disagree. “I can’t stay here, Mom. I can’t deal with the small town gossip. I was supposed to finish college and have an amazing life away from here.”
“You can still have an amazing life.”
“Mom, I can’t. I think I’m going to go stay at Grandma’s. Just for a little while.”
She opened her mouth to argue with me, but then closed it almost immediately as if she realized that arguing would do nothing to help the situation. She wrapped her arms around me and I could feel a tear fall from her face and soak through my shirt. I squeezed my hand around wrist for comfort and cried with her.
Submitted July 31, 2015 at 04:40AM by colafrank http://ift.tt/1DTG97t KeepWriting
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