Jeffery atheism

I recently hired this guy named Bob. As soon as I shook his hand and welcomed him aboard. I took him directly to the refrigerator. I showed him my sandwich, and I told him "Do not eat this sandwich. This is my sandwich." I then showed him where his desk was.

Things had been going well, until about 12:30 PM, when I had my lunch break. I went to the refrigerator and my sandwich was gone. I went to Bob's desk and sure enough, the Ziploc baggy with my name on it was lying there, empty on the desk.

I was so mad I gave everyone a pay cut. Including people yet to be hired. When new people came I simply told them about how Bob had eaten my sandwich, and it is their fault too because they were hired after him.

And then I hired a man named Jeffery (Who may or may not have been me wearing a mustache.) Jeffery was the textbook example of an employee. He never lied, he never stole, he went above and beyond...

One day, I realized everyone still had this pay cut, and I thought, "How am I ever going to forgive everyone for my sandwich?" Just then, I noticed a group of people yelling at Jeffery. They were mad at him because of his religious beliefs or something. But they were starting a mob and were taking Jeffery to the roof.

Moments later, I saw his body fly past my window, and I thought to myself, "Yes... yes. This is how I shall forgive my employees. This has saved them. I forgive them. I forgive my employees."

I removed the pay cut (except for my gay employees, people who don't kiss my ass 24/7, people looking at different jobs, etc.) and even gave them all a raise.

On that day, When Jeffery was thrown off of my building... he was thinking about Carole. He was thinking about Steve. He was thinking about all the people who hadn't been hired yet. And he was thinking about you. For that day, friends... that was the day... that Jeffery died for my sandwich.

Submitted May 13, 2015 at 06:16AM by TheElvenKeys http://ift.tt/1PFDi7a atheism