Ok, I need advice on whether or not I should pursue a girl... Below is the story, I'll try and keep it brief. ... Sorry it's long but I could really use some help, my friends are dicks and would be annoying to deal with.
I had met a girl, let's call her K, I met her at a social gathering and just learned her name. I thought that K would be perfect for me and had all the qualities I was looking for. I missed the opportunity to get to know her more and got with another girl. Fast forward a year and I was looking to get in a relationship. I could remember the first name of K but couldn't find her on any social media sites. I thought "well maybe I'll stumble across her again." Well just that happened as I was attending a baseball game and I saw her sitting in a section a local school had been selling tickets for. I chickened out and didn't talk to her but I made it a mission to find her again. Another search turned up empty. I was at my whit's end in the search for K. However fate looked upon me once again as me and a friend were hanging out and his female friend invited him over to her house with her two friends K and another chick. I wondered if it was the same K. We get to the house and it was in fact the very same K that I had been looking for. We talked a bit and I got the digits. I talked with her for about 2 months before we started going out. She had never really been in a relationship before and I wasn't an expert either, but I knew theoretically how to operate. Well her showing a slight interest in me made me try really hard and I kind of ended up brain washing myself and not seeing reality for what it was. I became clingy because I was not given a "fair chance" in my mind. But even though I was getting annoyed with K for not making time for me I didn't break up with her. I assumed she just didn't know how to act and was scared or insecure for some reason. This went along for a while with both parties miserable. She finally ended it and it made me feel bitter because I wasn't really given a chance.
Fast forward to now about a year and a half later.
In retrospect I see that I was smothering K, I couldn't see what was really going on (or couldn't believe it). Being captain hindsight I see that it was an absence of maturity in both parties that led to the ultimate downfall. In addition to her notion that having a boyfriend would make her "cooler" (which is majorly worrying). However that same feeling remained i count get rid of it, deep in my chest the feeling remained. I have had very little success with the opposite sex while K has been even less successful. I have slightly stayed in touch with things like happy birthday and congratulatory messages when she achieved things but nothing other than that. I recognized my clingy-ness and felt ashamed, I just wanted to leave her alone. My friend would still give me a hard time about her and mess with her from my phone whenever they could.
That said....
Valentine's Day and her birthday coming up I am wondering if i should try and reignite the fire that once had an ephemeral spark. My friend who talked to her has said I misinterpreted K in the beginning and I believe him to some degree. Other people, including K's friends have said we are a very good match. I am thinking of writing her a valentine, nothing creepy, she'll probably figure out its me but I don't know if I should. I've been told if I tried I could probably get her back. I'm partly doing this because I want to reignite the spark but mainly I just want to make her happy by showing her that someone thinks of her in a valentines-y way, her happiness would make me happy.
Also my situation is drier than the Atacama desert. But this feeling is something I just can't shake. I believe she's grown up a bit and I'm better for everything (if I can just keep a level head, which is way harder than it sounds).
Should I? Should I expect anything? Should I do it anonymously? I'm in desperate need her guys. I've always been told "if milk spoils repeatedly going to the refrigerator to see if it isn't spoiled is a waste of time."
I wrote this in the bathtub and didn't proofread. Sorry for typos I'm just all blocked up in thoughts.
Submitted January 24, 2015 at 11:15AM by jamnhock http://ift.tt/1CMxH9G Advice
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