TIFU by burning Hard Boiled Eggs. tifu

You read that right. I was making hard boiled eggs, and i burned them...

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  It is worth pointing out that I have had a cold for about two weeks now. So I am rather fatigued at this point. This will be important later on.

  
  

  Last night around 11PM i decided that i was hungry and i decided that some hard boiled eggs would be easy enough. In my house we don't just hard boil a few eggs for ourselves, extras get made because they keep in the refrigerator for a few days. So in the pot are a full dozen eggs as well as our egg timer that I am certain is older than i am. I put them on the fire to get boiling. At that point, i had about 20 minutes or so to kill, so i decided to take a quick shower.

  
  

  This is where I fucked up. Remember that cold I said I have? In the haze I currently live in, the shower was warm and comfortable and I, lost in my own little Eden, completely forgot that i was boiling eggs. So i get all squeaky clean and go to bed as is normal protocall after my evening showers.

  
  

  2:30 AM: Whats that horrible smell?

  
  

  2:31 AM: FUCK THE SMOKE ALARM WHHHYYYYYYYYYYY!!!

  
  

  2:32 AM: I remember those eggs i put on before my shower. Fuck.

  
  

  So here is the scene. My kitchen isn't on fire, thank the stars, but there is a smoke lair at the ceiling none the less. The pot has no water left , but does have what I am approximating to be about 5 eggs left in it. the rest had, at some point, exploded in all their firey glory and sent chunks of egg matter all over my kitchen, plastering the stove, walls, and much of the floor with egg whites and yolk. The egg timer is burnt and melted, fused with the bottom of the pan. and much of the egg matter had rolled under the pot and was sitting directly in the fire of my gas stove.

  
  

  I have thrown away the pot, and I am in here in my undershorts cleaning the stove when my roommates start to wake up. Windows are open and box fans in them at full blast. The smell is still just as strong and acrid as it was half an hour ago. It refuses to dissipate. and now i get to explain what has happened here to my roommates. And I still have a cold.

  
  

TLDR: Don't cook when you are sick because it is a bad day when you fall asleep while cooking.

Submitted November 19, 2014 at 11:14PM by Raewhen http://ift.tt/1ubDqQf tifu