I just realized a few months ago I was an ACON. I was programmed to put my family first ALWAYS. I went from being a GC to a SG at 14. Since that time I was EXPECTED to do everything for my siblings and my mother. At 18 when I was told by my mom that I would have to find a place to live, my sister and I moved in together. Within in a year she moved my younger siblings in. She wanted to play mom or to outshine our mom. My mom could care, as she wanted to party and chase younger men. I was expected to pay half of all the bills, but have no say so in the raising of my sister and brother or house. After a few years I wanted out, as my older sister continue to bring men home that she met off the internet. I moved on my own. Two weeks later my cousin was murdered, so I panicked and wanted to be close to my dysfunctional family. I was 22 and had never been alone. Within a year, i moved in with her Nmother. She was crazy. I stayed there until the home became like Sodom and Gomorrah. Since my name was on the new apartment my older sister got, I asked to move in. I stayed with her for 2 years. She kicked me out because she was mad I told her schizophrenic online stalker to leave while she was out of town one weekend. The man tried to sleep with my little sister and cousin. She blamed them. I then moved into my Nmom house. She traveled alot so the house was empty. I worked and paid the rent. She was suppose to pay the electric and gas. She was always behind on her portion, so I ended up paying both sides. I lived there until I was 29. I fled while she was at work and moved to another state to go to school. She was furious. I lived on my own while at school. I was happy, but the family called me everyday telling me their problems. I felt guilty so I answered the phone. I went overseas at 32 for a few months after my lease was up. I thought, well I'll save a few dollars I'll renew when I come back to the states. I moved back in with my mom. World War III happen with my younger GC drugged out brother tried to attack me. I moved back out of state. I could not find a job there. I tried and tried. I stayed in the hotel and my funds were dwindling. My older sister begged me to move in with her, because she did not want to live alone. At the time I had a monthly allowance my aunt gave me, as her caregiver, so I moved in. My sister told me that my aunt said I stole from her, she convinced me to stop working for my aunt. She said if I needed anything she would help me. Little did I know she LIED! My aunt never said it. My sister confessed that my aunt did not say it. She said well she insinuated it. I was shocked! I had no income and lived in her house. I did not know she hates me. Turns out she has been jealous of me all my life. I never knew. Had I known, I would have never come here. She ended up marrying a guy in December. She only saw him 30 times in her life. She traveled out of state to see him (she paid for everything). She even brought her own ring. He has no job anymore (not that he was making alot, she makes way more money than he ever did). She moved him in two weeks ago. It's so awkward. She brought a personal refrigerator for her room and cooks them meals. The main one stays empty most times. I recently graduated from graduate school. I now am 34. I have applied to countless jobs. I have no idea why I am not getting hired. I have to make the money in my account last, as I hate asking her for anything. She treats me like Cinderella at times. I have to fake it when i speak to her. I dislike her with a passion. I dislike my entire family. To go from being one of the wealthy ones, to not having the money I used to have is horrid. They are SNAKES! Once I get money again, I am going NC. I do not want ANYTHING to do with these evil people. I just feel so played. I cant believe i put my life on hold to raise their children, pay their bills and look out for their interest. NEVER AGAIN!
Submitted October 12, 2014 at 06:04AM by Goldenchildmybleep http://ift.tt/1xElqSK raisedbynarcissists
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