A while back I got hot pepper juice on my finger tips. Obviously I was super careful not to touch my eyes until a long, long hand washing. I went about my night eating the delicious chili I had made and watching some netflix. My without the wife being home was going fantastic.
Then I got an itch on my balls. Not a normal itch, mind you, one of those "Oh, I'm gonna have to go inside the pants to get this taken care of" itches. I put down my spoon and reached into my pajama pants. MMMMmmmm. That's the ticket. "Itch handled" I thought to myself. Then a small twinge of pain. Then the burning started.
I realized at that very second that I had neglected to clean the pepper acid from under my nails. It. Burned.
I jumped up and stripped naked. Not just taking off my PJ bottoms, everything had to go. I grabbed my desk fan, flicked it on and pointed it at my scrotum. The cool breeze did nothing.
My brain was racing, I was beginning to cry a little. I thought back to the last time I had my mouth burning up from hot peppers. MILK!!
I ran into the kitchen, buck naked, and grabbed a bowl. Opening the refrigerator, I discovered we were out of milk. All hope was lost until I remembered the baby formula can in the cabinet! It's pretty much milk right! So I fill the bowl with cold water and formula powder.
The front door opens. My wife walks in to find me naked and crying on the kitchen floor with my balls marinating in a bowl of baby formula.
Submitted October 10, 2014 at 01:45AM by demedus http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2ish8k/tifu_while_making_chili/ tifu
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