To start, I want to say that my relationship with my gf is fantastic, we love each other a lot, and we don't have any problems other than this little thing. We've been together for a little over a year and just moved in together last month.
My gf is super spacey and she forgets things all the time. She doesn't pay close attention when she does things. Usually it's little things, like baking a frozen pizza with the cardboard still underneath it, sometimes it's bigger things, like not closing the refrigerator door all the way so it's open all night, and rarely it's very big things, like missing the deadline to apply for financial aid for school.
She also loses things left and right. Phone chargers, glasses, stuff like that. She's lost multiple gifts I've given to her, including the bracelet I made for her for our first anniversary. I'm reluctant to buy her anything now because I'm afraid she'll lose it.
I obviously knew this about her early in our relationship, and I decided that it's something that I accept about her. Now that we live together, I take care of paying the rent and bills and she pays me back. I do the things that I'm particular about, like changing the sheets, because I want them done a certain way and I know she won't do it the way I want. I'm very specific when she asks if I need something from the grocery store, often sending a picture, because otherwise she'll grab something and not realize it's not the right thing. But I obviously can't be her babysitter and keep an eye on everything she does, nor would I want to.
She's told me that she knows she's spacey and it's caused problems in relationships in the past, but she doesn't know what to do about it. The mistakes she makes are obviously never intentional and she'll quickly do what she can to fix it once it's pointed out to her, but the fact that they happen so often is frustrating. It also stresses her out and makes her feel bad about herself.
My question: Does anyone have suggestions on how to combat the spaciness? I don't know what would help because it seems like she's just not paying attention when she does things. Any tips on, I don't know, increasing awareness? Or do I simply need to accept that this is the way she is and learn to work around it? If so, how can I help her without becoming her babysitter?
tl;dr: Gf is a space cadet. Ways to mitigate that?
Submitted January 07, 2015 at 12:15AM by spacecadetgf http://ift.tt/1AmT6ZI relationships
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