After posting my tale of PizzaMoon I got a rush of Beetus suppressed memories of previous encounters and I need to share them.
Be
Me: Hoppestupid 5'8" 200lbs in this story, but could still see my penis
Sometimes Be
CakeBoss: Bakery manager that could be your friend or worst enemy depending on her mood.
Don't Be
ScootiPuff: landwhale on a grocery store scooter. 300+lbs of unnecessary ranting.
I worked behind the counter of a grocery store bakery. The job was simple enough just take bakery orders, package prebaked goods and what not. It was just my manager and I working that day and she was in a good mood, which is good for me. I'm ringing up a customer when I see scootipuff driving full speed towards me.
fuck
She approaches the counter and I greet her.
Hi, how may I help you
Note she talks very loud, not shouting but just raises her voice so the whole store can hear her.
I've got a cake order under "scootipuff" make it quick im in a hurra.
No problem let me get the cake
Ima gonna get a few things real quick ill be back
k, I can ring you up here when you're back
She had ordered a full sheet cake and I had removed it from our refrigerator and placed it on a counter. 10 minutes pass and my manager is asking me why a cake order not in the fridge. I explain and she goes off. Another 10 minutes pass and I'm about to return the cake back to the fridge when scootipuff drifts towards my counter.
sorry about the hold up, heh heh, everything I need is soo far apart.
no problem let me show you the cake
As I lifted the cake cover, her eyes widen like she just hit the jack pot of sugar.
O my, that ther is a pretty cake. My baby girl is gonna love it.
I hope she does
I love your guys cakes, there sugar free and fat free.
This is where I fucked up. Our cakes are the worst things to get in the bakery. I corrected her
sorry Ma'am, but our cakes are not sugar and fat free (healthy to shorten it).
O god. Now I've fucked up
Whaaat! I've been ordering cakes from you people and you telling me they aint healthy. I was told they were healthy.
Ma'am I'm sorry but they have never been healthy.
Let me speak to yo manager this is ridiculous.
I go and grab my manager and she is giving me this evil glare and debating if its worth the time to knock me out and throw me in the oven and announce to customers that "we have meat pies in the bakery, just for you"
CakeBoss: Hi what seems to be the problem
yo clerk is tellin me that these cakes aint healthy
CakeBoss: Sorry Ma'am our cakes have never been healthy
I've been coming here for x amount of years and was told they were healthy
cakboss: I've been here for x amount of years and I can assure you they are not
This went on for another minute or two and scootipuff gives up and she realizes she has a party. I go and ring her up and forgot to mention that her kart is overflowing with bbq supplies. I go and ring up the x amount of ground beef, frozen buffalo wings, crate of beatus, cups, serviettes, plates, and the cake. Tell her the amount and she hand me a food stamp card. I have no issue with people using food stamps, but seeing how she had non food items and didnt hand me any other legal tender and thinking the transaction was complete. I ask her
Ok ma'am your total now is $x.xx
my card shoulda covered everything thats odd
Ma'am you have non food items
This is ridiculous, I've never had an issue before
Ma'am I don't make the rules
Fine I don't want them, I guess we gonna eat with our hands because of you
I remove all non food items but see that my register still telling me the transaction not complete and remember that energy drinks are not covered by food stamps.
almost finished here, I just need to take the monsters out...
Nooooo! I need those. Monsters are food items
Ma'am no they are not. I can get a manager to confirm this if you would like.
Take it then, Ima neva gonna shop here again.
She drives away and other customers who were watching nodded at me and others laughed. I walk in the back and my manager has this shit grin.
cakeboss: you have fun?
Too much fun
cakeboss: thats good, well I'm leaving early mop the bakery for me.
Submitted October 12, 2014 at 01:30AM by Hoppestupid http://ift.tt/1qGdavU fatpeoplestories
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