In addition to the weight loss and body transformation, I’m also half way through my degree, and I’ve got a new gf.
All I could think about was how my cousins used to bully me for being fat. That bullying lead me to be timid and distrusting of people which made me unable to make friends as a kid. I even had aunts make fun of me because I didn’t have friends.
I was trying to lose weight in the seventh grade. My mom put a “before” picture of me on our refrigerator because she was proud of me for taking initiative.
A cousin who went to the same school but was a grade ahead took the picture. My mom and I couldn’t figure out what happened to it and figured it got knocked on the floor and swept up and thrown away.
Well he took it and showed everybody. All the girls and guys in his grade and mine and in the 6th grade.
It was pure hell for me at school that week. The principal actually told me and my mom that transferring to a different was probably the best option. My cousin showing that picture to everyone and spear-heading the bullying basically made me the punching bag of jr high.
I guess because the kids thought it his own family treats him this way, we can too.
All of this and more went through my mind on the drive there. My gf of course knows all this and is super supportive of me and wanted to be there with me.
We got there and when my family saw me they looked stunned. The cousin who showed our school the picture of me is actually overweight now. If I had to guess I’d say he’s probably got 40-50 pounds to lose.
For a moment I felt so good—so incredibly satisfied and filled with schadenfreude. And then I felt disgusted with myself. I wasn’t feeling good because of my own successes. I felt good because I, in a way, made some of the people who bullied me feel bad.
I don’t know what your morals on this would be but I just felt like an asshole. I felt it would be wrong of me to rub it in their faces.
My cousin who did the picture thing didn’t eat the entire night. My gf and I were about to leave and I decided to go and extend an olive branch. I didn’t go right at it because his pride would have made him reject me. Instead I just said we should catch up and that I can get him a free month at my gym. He took me up on the offer. It’s weird that we didn’t have a direct conversation about the bullying or his weight.
All in all I feel...weird about this. I mean, I don’t mind working out with him, but I really don’t want a relationship with this person.
Idk I got caught up in my own shit. My gf and I talked about this and basically concluded that we both (for different reasons) need to learn to let go of the past.
I’m not sure how things are gonna go with my cousin, but worst case scenario, my school has a gym.
Submitted December 29, 2017 at 03:07AM by camealongassway http://ift.tt/2zJkMcW loseit
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